'Fjorking marvellous!' That was the ecstatic response of a weatherbeaten but highly enebreated Captain Sven Njoordstrom of the SS Norway as he returned from his lates epic voyage around Hull to discover the amazing worldwide response to the 'liddle kiddies' appeal.
With a tear in his eye and a fish in his trousers he blubbed 'I thjink this crazy engljish man is dojing the righjt thing'...'the Bjath Hjalf Mjarathon ..and just thjink of all thjose liddle South West kiddies who will rjeap the rjewards.
Clearly both tjired (surely just tired -Ed) and emotjional (oh for Gods sake-Ed) he sobbed 'Shjome of these fjolk are clearly charity smart arshes. I believe they should fjell wery smug about deir wjonderful actijons '
However, the cod slicing, liver oil swilling, self styled 'mjaster of the Shjeven Shjeas' warned that 'shjome oder fjolk sheem to be charity lard arses'
Brandishing his 16 inch fish gutting knife he claimed 'sjuch pjeople are in djanger of bejing shent to the Norweigian Naughtjy Corner unless they rejconshider their virtual djonating positions'
So...thank you all you smart arses for your wonderful support..and come on you lard arses..there's still time for all the rest of you out there ....and you know who you are....to give the old Captain a right old rodgering. Dig deep into your virtual wallets! You know it makes sense!
Don't forget ..it's the 2010 Bath Half Marathon for me on March 7th 2010......and it's all for the littlle Kiddies of the South West .....ahhhh...
Children's Hospice South West provides hospice care for children with life limiting conditions and their families....that in itself is reason enough to give loads of dosh....but if you need more encouragement to sponsor then remember this... what other charity was set up by Belinda's cousin Jill? I can't think of one.... or I'd be running for them.
Now it's time for me to ask you to put your hands into your virtual pockets.....and the deal is...I promise to finish if you promise not to let the liddle kiddies down
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