My husband, Alan Imber, died on 27th September 2008 of cancer.
He had been diagnosed 6 weeks earlier, following a 3 week period of back pain which we put down to the fact that he had recently had an operation to replace his knee, which we assumed was having an effect on his posture, and style of walking.
As the pain increased, Alan eventually visited the doctor, who immediately sent him to the RD&E for tests (by this time he could hardly walk). Following these tests, which included a biopsy of his liver, we were given the news that he had advanced secondary cancer of the liver, with, probably, primary in the bowel. This could not be confirmed, as it was so small and he was too ill to operate on. He was referred to the pain control team and various drug regimes were introduced to find the best way to relieve his pain.
He came home after 3 weeks and I nursed him during this time, supported by Annie, a nurse from the Hospiscare Team, who visited us regularly, and Devon Doctors On Call, both of whom I seemed to be telephoning all the time. Alan and I discussed with Annie the best thing to do when the time came that I would be unable to cope with his needs. We had the option of nurses coming to our (very small) house, or the Hospice - Alan decided that the Hospice would be the better option.
The night before he was admitted, he needed to go to the bathroom but could not remember how to get out of bed - the effects of the drugs combined with the cancer were affecting his mind. After getting him settled, I rang the Hospice and said that it was time for him to go in. The ambulance came the following morning, after a very disturbed night in which he was in great pain.
Alan died 6 hours later in the Hospice, being cared for by the most wonderful people I have ever met. I would particularly like to mention Sophie who was the nurse assigned to him and so very supportive of all the family when he died. I noticed how discreet and gentle the caring was as he lay unconcious and how much attention was given in making him as comfortable as possible.
Thank you for taking the time to visit my JustGiving page.
Best regards
Helen Imber
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