RAISING MONEY FOR A WHEELIE BIN

I know this sounds stupid… but this is the Golden Age of Stupid.

Peak Park Authority have removed all the litter bins at Bowden Bridge Car Park in Hayfield, High Peak, BECAUSE PEOPLE WERE USING THEM! The location is at the start of the 1932 Mass Trespass which resulted in the UK’s first National Park. The irony of this is that if it wasn’t for the Mass Trespass, Peak Park Authority wouldn’t exist! We have had confirmation that they will not be replacing the bins. To the best of my knowledge I understand Peak Park Authority are a Government grant funded quango and they have stated like many authorities they are having financial problems. So for 2024 we produced an alternative Hayfield CountryFile Detritus Calendar to highlight the problem, but this fell on deaf ears so we are now crowdfunding for a wheelie bin which locals have named "Binnie" (the Pooh) our local Civic Superhero. Anyone donating a tenner or more may have their name printed on the side of the bin to show they “really care” about the countryside. Any excess funds over our target may well be passed on to the NHS to purchase some “proper” PPE equipment! Also we'll donate to some local deserving charities. And I promise you good people that I will not be putting the money off shore or indeed building a swimming pool in my back garden with the proceeds! There was also talk of even putting Civic Superhero Binnie forward as a candidate at the general election! This is indeed a very small metaphor for the present state of our nation. The bin is now signed up and on display at the Sportsman, Kinder Road, Hayfield SK22 2LE. We are still receiving donations for names to appear on Binnie's lid.

If our humble request really takes off we could produce some Binnie the Pooh litter pickers (as seen above) to train the next generation of kids in the lost art of civic pride litter picking which will become an Olympic sport in the new Principality State of Hayfield. We are also considering entering Binnie into the Turner Prize as street art... and also other ideas sent in by you wonderful people.

Keep smiling people and keep your sense of humour... before we get taxed for having a good larf!

Heap big hugs. My heart warms to you all.

HRH Prince Chief Crazy Horse II (& Tribe) Hayfield’s Premier League Village Idiot. Founding member of the RSPCB (Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Bins). PS. The reason we need more than the cost of a humble wheelie bin is for a detritus collection Waste Transfer Licence and insurance if we should get permission off Peak Park Authority.