This was Xavier, and he changed my life.

I hadn't considered using a powerchair - I figured if I was able to hobble around indoors, I didn't need one. Fibromyalgia and severe Rheumatoid Arthritis aside (!!!) I had it in my head that powerchairs are for paralysed people was my reasoning. And so I stayed stubbornly housebound and unable to go anywhere or have any form of social interaction. I figured if I could move around in my hallway without falling over, I wasn't really THAT bad. The only reason I didn't fall was because I usually would hit a wall before I hit the floor, but details.

I didn't go anywhere. I didn't do anything. People in my village didn't even realise I lived there, because they never saw me out and about. I had lived in the village for 3 years, and only left the house for medical appointments. Once I stopped being able to drive, I didn't even do that.

After an OT carefully explained to me that no, what I was doing wasn't technically walking, and yes, she really endorsed the idea of me getting a chair - and a life! -, I spent my High Rate Mobility money from DLA on a Motability chair, named it Xavier...and suddenly discovered powerchairs are amazing.

Xavier gave me legs that worked. Xavier gave me wings. I was once more able to go out and about, take my son to the movies, hold my fiancé's hand, I wasn't in constant pain due to trying stupidly to stand and walk somewhere I needed to be. I could go out on my own without worrying about getting stranded when I no longer had the energy to use crutches.

Unfortunately, Xavier wasn't mine. And when I lost my DLA (as many people nowadays are doing), I lost Xavier as well. Back to being housebound. Back to watching the world go by from my bedroom window. But now I've had a taste at what other people take for granted, and I'm not prepared to give it up so easily just because the government decides to cut support.

So, the mission is to purchase a new-to-me chair. Xavier wasn't cheap - it was a top of the line Puma 40, which easily goes for over £4500 new. I know it surprises people to realise powerchairs can cost more than a car, but there you are. My original intention was to buy a used version of same, but my illness is progressing, and due to various factors it turns out this chair is no longer suitable for me. I now require a more robust (and much more expensive) chair, which is ...depressing, but necessary. I've already chosen a name, too, because that's the important part - she'll be Oracle.

I know the internet is full of people in need. I'm not the most popular face in social media, but I'm trying to give this a go and hope for the best. I want my legs back.

I want my wings back.

Thanks in advance.

*******

UPDATE: I have met with the charity Mobility Trust, who have sent an OT and a mobility specialist out to recommend a chair for me. As it turns out, my illness has progressed to a point where the OT felt I need to use the chair indoors as well as outside - this came as a bit of a shock to me personally, but it makes sense. I'm currently mostly bed bound, and I no longer go upstairs if I can help it. The chair model I've been suggested is mid-wheel drive, an Invacare TDX2 - a very nice chair with lots of features, and considerably cheaper than the Quickie Jive. The report and prescription was being worked on this week, but it's the holiday season and we will not hear anything further about the chair until then.

I've decided I'm going to close the fundraiser for the moment until things play out with this current venture. It may be the charity will fund the chair itself, as there's clearly more need than even I was aware of. I am still reeling from that information, but the two specialists were very supportive and hoped my appeal would make some quick progress. I am going to trust and hope in the process. I thank those who have donated so far, and I will gladly reimburse everyone for now. If I need to open this page again I will do so at another time, but...well, here's hoping I won't have to.

I wish joy and prosperity to you and yours in the new year!