Conflict is a reality of married life. Many couples perceive it as a menace to their relationship instead of looking at it as an opportunity for potential growth. Conflict can be traced to problem areas that remained unsolved or inability of couples to handle it the right way. No couples are willing to have problems and conflicts that arise from difference of opinions.

There is one thing important for the couple to realize. It is their willingness to learn to welcome the opportunity to grow in understanding each other and to use problems to make their marriage stronger. How? Well, they can seek the help of a marriage counselor monmouth county nj. Otherwise, they can go over the common causes of marital discord.

Common causes of marital problems:

Couples get caught in a loop with recurring problems, rehashing the same old issue, yet, never finding an answer. There are common explanations why couple has persistent disagreements as this source shows. Understanding the reasons is the first move to stop the cycle.

A spouse is making an effort to heal hurts from childhood

The constant bickering of a couple can be traced from unsettled conflicts that occur in one or both couple's families. Take the case of a wife who endlessly argues to have a closer relationship with her husband because of her perception that the husband seemed so distant. She still has the emotional hurt caused by an aloof childhood relationship with one of her parents and which she is trying to heal. The triggering issues have to be known and worked through. If this is not addressed, the problem persists.

A spouse is struggling for control in the relationship

Sex or money is the usual problem area. Who controls the money? One couple has to lose or gives in order to resolve the argument but there can be resentment and unhappiness.

The couple's argument becomes habitual

The pattern of arguing has been started, making it easier for the couple to fall into it again than try a different way of handling the conflict. They end up not solving by rehashing the same issues.
The couple is actually looking for a way to connect

Or this is a spouse's way to get the attention of the other, picking a fight. This is not a healthy way to bridge the gap between spouses.

Solutions for ending marital problems:

With these factors contributing to repetitive arguments, couples have to learn the following solutions for ending marital problems.

Be alert on the warning signals leading to recurring squabbles
The three most common are: obsessive thinking about your spouse's offending behavior, a sense of building tension, and heightened irritability. If you know you are veering into this cycle, there is an opportunity to prevent an argument before it ensues.

Deal with problems as they happened

Pay attention to your feelings. The earlier you realize what bothers you, the more likely you are able to head off a clash. View the website to find out how you can seek help in dealing with marital problems.

Remember, recurring arguments can be a positive sign in marriage. It happens because you try to make your relationship healthier. As long as you are not hurting each other, not controlling the other, or being self-righteous, then it becomes destructive. Work out on ending marital problems by seeking the help of a marriage counselor Monmouth county NJ and you can notice that things are improving!