Tilly Oldham

Tilly Oldham (or Tilly Lawless, as she was known on Facebook where she used her husband's surname), was diagnosed with a brain tumour In April 2013.  However after receiving an MRI scan it was discovered she had nine tumours in her brain and two in her lungs.  She had had a mole removed from her stomach ten years earlier which the doctors had told her was a malignant melanoma, but they assured her it had been completely removed.  It hadn't, and over the course of the next ten years this melanoma travelled to her brain and lungs and slowly began to grow. 

The doctors told her her life expectancy was likely to be measured in months rather than years, with six months being the longest she might be expected to live.  She actually lived for nine months, during which time she endured whole brain radiotherapy, chemotherapy and gamma knife surgery.  This invasive treatment, together with the effects the tumours were having, caused much unpleasantness and pain.  But despite the pain, and knowing her time was coming to an end, no one ever heard her complain about what had happened to her and she never felt sorry for herself.  Instead she tried to get on with life as best she could.

Tilly had been a nurse all her life, initially in the Army, then in General Nursing, before specialising in Mental Health.  If ever a person was destined to be in a caring profession it was Tilly.  Whether it was a stray cat, a homeless person begging in the street, or a patient on the verge of suicide or self harm, Tilly could not rest until she'd done everything humanly possible to help them.  Her case load was always full to capacity as patients, in their darkest hours, realised they'd found someone who would listen to them, understand what they were going through and help them to overcome their struggles and get their lives back on track.

Tilly's personality was such that people would talk to her for ten minutes and would feel they'd known her all her life, this made her many friends, and since she passed away the outpouring of grief has been immense, but the messages of love and respect have been very touching to observe.

Tilly always loved flowers and a day didn't pass by that there weren't flowers in the house.  Though it would seem fitting to celebrate Tilly's life with floral tributes, Tilly also spent a lot of her time supporting charities, and we hope you will also be able to support a charity today in memory of Tilly and maybe also share a few words or memories about Tilly.

 

Our chosen charity is Brain Tumour Research.  Brain tumours are the biggest cancer killer of UK adults and children yet receive less than 1% of the national spend on cancer research.  They are the only national charity in the UK funding sustainable and continuous research into brain tumours.  If you can, please help them to continue this vital research.

 

We'd like to thank everyone for being so generous with both their donations and their loving words about Tilly.  Many of the messages mention the support and love Tilly gave to people at times when they were in need of help, and those who knew Tilly knew that no matter if it was family, friends, her patients or just someone in need of some kind words, Tilly was always there for anyone who needed her.  It seems very appropriate therefore that in memory of a woman who spent her life giving that little bit extra to people, everyone has also given a bit extra and we've now hit our £1,000 target.  But please don't stop donating.  Brain tumour research is such a worthy cause that relies on people's generosity to enable it to continue its essential work.  It would be a wonderful tribute to Tilly if our initial target was exceeded substantially, please give what you can.  Thank-you.

 

JustGiving:

Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Your details are safe with JustGiving – they’ll never sell them on or send unwanted emails. Once you donate, they’ll send your money directly to the charity. So it’s the most efficient way to donate – saving time and cutting costs for the charity.