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I am starting this page first and foremost as a place for me to save money up and hopefully with your help also have a few donations added also to help me along in my journey.
My name is Billy, as of October 2018 and I am Transgender, FTM (female to male). I am 26 years old and this is something that I have personally struggled with for the most part of my life to date, recognising a difference in myself to others as early as Primary School. I came out officially last October and since then I have had a referral sent to Leeds Gender Clinic and I on the waiting list to be seen.
I am currently paying privately to receive Testosterone due to the high waiting lists with the NHS.
Some background to the wait - I had a telephone screening in February of this year to talk with Leeds GIC and to receive my wait in the queue. During this phone call, the lovely lady I spoke with informed me that there is a substantial wait for everything in this department as Gender Identity is a fairly new issue to be recognised and worked towards.
I was told that after the phone call received it would be a minimum of 10 months until an initial face-to-face appointment at the clinic to complete checks to ensure this is the right thing for me. An additional years wait to be seen at the Hormone clinic to receive Testosterone, and then an approximate 19 months wait to begin any sort of referral in regards to surgery - surgery waiting times not included.
For me, and many others in my position, this is a huge blow as naturally as soon as we are out, we would like everything to have happened yesterday and be in the body we know we truly should be.
Body dysmorphia for me is waking up in the morning and dreading pulling back the duvet to see this foreign and almost alien body that I am trapped in. It is hearing "she" and "her" for 26 years and knowing in myself that it does not real right. It is having watched the development of my younger brother go through the normal changes in puberty, with voice deepening and body structure changing and growth of facial hair and loving him to death but also being so frustrated that I am six years his senior and those changes will never happen to me naturally.
Since beginning Testosterone, some of these feelings about myself have come to subside a little, my voice is due to break and one of these days I'll grow my first facial hair and cherish it like a child! But I do feel as though I have to bind my chest, I do wear t-shirts too big for me to hide my chest. I am dreading the approach of summer and knowing how I will sweat profusely in too many layers to keep myself hidden and more comfortable mentally.
I want to set myself a challenge of saving enough money to pay for my top surgery privately. I don't want to give in to the dreadful thoughts that jazz around in my head while I'm waiting almost four years to have the opportunity to have this surgery on the NHS and I would appreciate any penny you may be able to donate!
I am also looking to do some fund raising events in the near future to add to this sum, suggestions are more than welcome and I am willing to try almost anything to achieve this goal!!
Thank you so much in advance, if you cannot donate; share the story, spread the word, or just take some time to learn about Transgender and the wonderful lives that can be made possible with the help of surgery and also understanding. Love each other no matter what, all anyone wants from life is love and happiness, and we all deserve it.
Lots of love,
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Jun 30, 2019
All the best on your journey! xoxo
Jun 25, 2019
Jun 24, 2019
From some friends who bought raffle tickets, xxx
Jun 24, 2019
Wishing you all the best Billy, I hope you get to feel more at home in your body as soon as possible ox
Jun 22, 2019
Love you will donate more
Jun 22, 2019
Jun 15, 2019
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