Three years ago i was diagnosed with a very rare salivary gland cancer, Acinic Cell Carcinoma of the parotid gland, I had a tumour in my face close to my ear the size of a whole walnut. I had surgery to remove the tumour which went well but i got an infection so ended up back in hospital. The pain after my surgery was the worst pain I have experienced and I was left with a deformed face, I have a dent in my face where the tumour and surrounding salivary gland was removed. Once healed I started an intensive six week course of radiotherapy, I couldn’t talk or eat, I had burns all in my mouth and on my face and neck.

A routine scan of my chest showed a mass on my thymus gland so I had an open left thymectomy to remove it. This was another major surgery, my left lung had to be collapsed so they could remove my thymus gland and the mass, my ribs were seperated to reach it. I had a drain in my left lung and a thin line into my back that adminstered morphine. Luckily the mass was benign.

I have been suffering with the effects of the radiotherapy ever since and have severe pain constantly in my face. I am still recovering and without the love and support of my family and friends I really don’t think I would have got through it. I haven’t got a great quality of life as I hate going out because people stare at my face and all the surgery and radiotherapy caused my Fibromyalgia to flare up so I couldn‘t go out if I wanted to. Even now three years later from the side you can see muscle and salivary gland are missing, my skin is sitting on the bone of my jaw and i have a dent in that side. Its amazing how people do stare, some even reel back in disgust. It makes me feel so sad and depressed that I stay at home to spare the looks.

My life was finally getting back to normal and I was looking forward to moving to Scotland with my partner, starting a whole new lifes adventure being as I had been given a second chance at life.

My partner told me that they didn’t love me anymore as they said they wanted their life back and that they felt like a prisoner over the last ten years, that they felt isolated and I was a scrounger because I couldn’t work, they said it was all down to me, I was ill, I couldn’t help being bed ridden due to severe pain and spasms. I never made them stay in, I even encourged them to go out, more fool me as I later found out. They had been having an affair for possibly three years but I only found out after they left. They walked out on Valentine’s day this year and never came home, my home was on the market and they said they would never leave me in a mess or homeless, they said they would pay the mortgage and household bills for a while but never gave any dates.

This is where and why I really need your help please.

My partner has stopped helping towards the mortgage and bills and has turned my life upside down, I can’t pay the mortgage and bills on my own and my partner has and is ignoring my pleas to help with the bills etc and turned into a person I no longer know or loved. Their attitude towards me was like I was nothing more than dirt on their shoe and they seem adamant on taking everything from me. They have reduced me to feeling worthless with nothing to live for. Now my home is going to be repossessed as I am three months in arrears, I asked my mortgage company for help back in April before the arrears but they have offered no help other than repossession.

I am not ashamed to say that all of this has pushed me into depression and I’ve become so low not knowing what else I can do so I felt like no other option but to attempt to take my own life.

My cancer specialist has found three more lesions in my face but they are too small to surgically remove so I have to wait for them to grow.

I am a proud person and it has taken a lot for me to ask for help, I don’t know what else to do, the price of my house has been lowered more than three times but still hasn’t sold.

I don’t want to lose my home, I’ve lived here for 22 years. I also don’t want to be homeless if I have to have cancer treatment again which I explained to my mortgage company, they really aren’t bothered about making a disabled person homeless that may need cancer treatment.

Thank you for reading this.

Please, please will you help me to get the money to pay my mortgage to keep a roof over my head, I have worked all of my life until I became ill and I love my home, I really don’t want to lose my home and become homeless. I know a lot of people are in the same boat but I really need your help, please, I really can’t cope with all this stress plus trying to heal a broken heart.