Ever since i can remember, i have always hated my body, and i dont just mean in a way that everyone hates their body, i hate my body in a really angry way.

When i turned 21 i began to gain weight due to a traumatic time in my life and ever since i have gained and lost and gained again until i pyhsically and mentally cannot take anymore. I have as a result suffered with Depression and Anxiety ever since.

I avoid social events, i wont even go to a supermarket at lunch times, evenings or weekends for example in case i see someone i know, i even travel 15 miles out of town to a different supermarket to be extra sure i dont see anyone i know. I have to plan and then get anxiety about what i will wear each day, even for an event that could be a year later, as i need to cover my body as best as possible. What upsets me most is that my daughter only has a handful of photographs of me as i find myself so repulsive on camera i cannot bare to take a picture.

So, after years of trying every diet possible, after years of starving myself, after years of punishing myself one way or another, i have decided to have cosmetic surgery but this comes at a significant cost which i cannot raise myself and i am therefore asking for any help, no matter how small, that anyone can give me.

Thank you.