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Well where do I even start with a story that doesn't even seem real..
I still remember the phonecall like it was yesterday. I'd missed him randomly turning up at my house to tell me in person. The phone call from my best friend with the best possible news that he was going to be a dad. Now knowing Alex, I knew he was at the stage in life where he needed that little miracle to complete him. The twinkle in his eye as he spoke about preparations just proved how amazing he was going to be as a father. He's so impatient so I knew that 9 month would've felt like a lifetime! Every now and then he would message me with a daddy diary update and they never failed to crack me up. On the 27th November 2015, you could hear the pride in his voice as he called to tell me that Lily. He was so proud that his princess was finally here. Hearing him talk about her literally would make my day and I couldn't wait to meet her. I felt like I already knew the little personality she already had and it breaks my heart to say that day never came for me to have a cuddle💔 instead I had to receive news I never thought I'd have to hear. I guess God decided that Lily was far too precious and pure to be put on this earth and was ready for her to return to heaven after just over one month. How could he receive such a perfect christmas present for it to be taken at such sudden notice? These types of question will never have answers.
Everyone's hearts were broken but Alex..a part of him left with lily and he was unable to see how he could go on. In old alex style he would try and make me and everyone think he was ok. He'd still crack his jokes, he'd still make fun of me but he had changed. His world had fallen apart but he had the biggest support base I know and that's what kept him going. Some days he couldn't face the world and others he would be ready to take it on. He took each day as it came and the admiration I have for him is indescribable. We spent hours planning ways that he could focus his drive on making a change to other families in similar situations and that's when the fundraising began. That is him down to a tee..even though life threw unbearable obstacles he still managed to think of helping others.
I may be crazy but I thought that little alex twinkle was returning in his eye. He was finally beginning to see positivity in his future and planning things he wanted to achieve.
With this in mind you will understand the shock, despair and hate for the world I felt when I received the news that my best friend had been taken forever. I knew he was an angel a long time ago for the things he'd helped me overcome but I didn't think his wings were ready to grow this soon. So again I ask the question - how can one family deserve this much heartache? Alex had a way of putting everybody before himself and with that touched the lives of hundreds of people. this brings me to the reason for this page.. I could write for hours about the memories I have or about his personality but I think every individual has their own personal ones that they should reflect upon as they read this.
He may not be here to complete the wolf run I sure as hell will not let him down, it may be a bit later on than I’d hoped but I’m going to cross that finish line in his memory as we know it's what he wanted to do. I’d like to take a leaf out of his book his and raise whatever I can as a way of thanking him for the 10 years of friendship I was lucky enough to share with him. Having served in Afghanistan, he proved just how selfless he was and managed to put people before himself on a daily basis regardless of his own struggles. For this reason I will be sending all donations to PTSD UK as have others in his name.
Please please give what you can whether it be a single pound I know he'd be more than grateful. As you donate, if you'd like to add your own memories of him then please feel free I’m sure anyone that knows him would love to hear of his mischief ❤️
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Jessica Payne started crowdfunding