I was meant to be getting my top surgery via the NHS this October but I was told in March that my surgery was indefinitely postponed due to issues outside of my control. It's been several months since this announcement and I am no closer to accessing top surgery nor have I gained a clearer understanding of when I will be able to.

Almost immediately after this announcement my mental health completely nose dived, and has not yet recovered. Whilst I am hesitant to blame this entirely on being unable to access top surgery - it certainly hasn't helped.

I feel incredibly frustrated that I can't continue with on with my life, that I'm trapped in this limbo of waiting for something that I know is going to greatly improve my life!

Whilst it's difficult for me to describe what this surgery means for me, to put it simply: safety, comfort and happiness.

I feel that I have been incredibly blessed in this life to be trans - but I am very much done with the dysphoria part of it now! So please help!