Thanks for visiting my JustGiving Page:)

I’m running the Paris marathon on the 3rd of April raising money for one of my closest friend, Luca’s, gender confirmation surgery & for Sunflower Relief, a charity supporting people suffering from the war and humanitarian crisis in Ukraine. I would love it if you donated!

Breakdown

- 80% of the money raised will go towards four operations that Luca needs + recovery and rehabilitation. The cost of the first surgery alone is more than $75k.

- 20% will go to Sunflower Relief, a charity offering assistance to vulnerable individuals who have been physically, mentally or socially, injured and wounded, orphaned children, the elderly, internally displaced persons and families who have lost their main earners.

From Luca

It’s hard to explain through language what it feels like to have gender dysphoria. I always knew what I wanted: I was a boy, I wanted to be referred to as one, and I wanted my physical exterior to match how I felt inside. I wanted society and everyone I loved within it to see me as who I am.

This wanting goes back to my earliest memories. Whenever someone tried to enforce gender typical roles, like even calling me my female name, “Tati”, I would insist that wasn’t me and I was in fact “Tato”. The irony is that this was my Dad's name; he would buy me army gear and fake guns and not dismiss my claims that I wasn’t who I technically was. He was the only person who understood, yet passed away too soon to see my transformation into Luca.

The realisation I was trans wasn’t one that was easy to accept. The way trans people are treated and depicted in media made me feel ashamed and as a result I developed internalised transphobia. In short, I hated myself, and tried my hardest to pretend I was a girl to receive the love and opportunities that trans people supposedly aren’t worthy of.

Since coming out I’m so happy with what I’ve achieved so far. Thanks to having top surgery and taking testosterone I can’t express how happy it makes me doing simple daily things that before caused me so much pain, like wearing the clothes I do and going into the mens loos. A huge part of the mental suffering has been relieved and people finally see me for the person I have always been.

As much as it’s exciting I still have to undergo 4 operations and over a years worth of healing to feel my true self. Even though it’s going to be extremely mentally and physically challenging I know this will be worth it to feel finally complete. Now that this final possibility is within reach I am so excited to liberate myself from this heavy weight and step into pure joy. Finally stepping into life as the person I’ve always felt.

The experience of being trans can often be very isolating as it is not an experience any of my friends or family can directly relate to. However, I am so grateful for all of the support I have received so far. Every time someone shows love and encouragement, donates or listens, it somehow helps me overcome all the messages I absorbed growing up; that being trans is disgusting or a joke. Thank you so much for donating, your support makes me feel like I am not walking this path alone.

From Paddy

Luca is one of the strongest people I know. We went to Edinburgh University together and although life, work, Brexit & corona have pulled each of us across the UK and Europe over the past five years we have been on many an adventure.

When Luca was living in Valencia, tentatively peering into a new life, we unsuccessfully went looking for the Valencian underground LGBTQ scene ending up in a series of empty clubs listening to the pshhh of smoke machines and the mechanical twist of 1980’s disco lights. Later, when I was in living in Belsize Park I had the massive privilege of playing Luca’s barber, clumsily muddling our way through his first shave with my brother Seanie. In between many beautiful moments, Luca has been unbelievably strong often walking this path alone. We are so lucky to have platforms like this that give us all the chance to be part of the next step of this journey!!

It was heartbreaking to see Ukrainian people and those from across the Slavic world crying here in Amsterdam at the protest last Sunday. The humanitarian crisis is growing every day. In the six days between the 24th of February alone 660,000 refugees fled Ukraine each of whom needs help, support and resources.

I couldn’t be prouder to raise money for these two causes and ask that you give as generously as you can!!

Thanks for reading & lots of love.

Paddy