Please help Julie and Julia to give Paul Walker the send-off he deserves

Recently we lost our dear friend, Paul. Paul was one of a kind, having lived more of a life than most. He was a larger than life character, who told fascinating stories of his life experiences and was a mine of information on many subjects, particularly theology. He also had a fabulous and often wicked sense of humour and a wonderful way of looking at life, never trying to take either himself or life too seriously.

Paul grew up in a working-class background in Manchester in the 1950's & 60's in his parents pubs. He went on to run pubs of his own, later joining the RAF Regiment and serving on the front-line in various countries. He had also travelled all over the continent as a long-distance lorry driver. Paul worked for a while as a counsellor and later in life had a short stint of teaching and was an active and vocal member of the Labour Party (until they cancelled his membership for being too opinionated!).

After marrying and having two sons, Lee and Karl, many years later, Paul came out as being gay and met the love of his life and long-term partner, Tom, whilst working as a nightclub bouncer. Paul and Tom made quite a comedy couple, generally cracking jokes at other’s expense, but their loyalty and love to each other shone through. They were two of the kindest people you could wish to meet, always helping others and it was Paul’s kindness, warm nature and generosity of spirit that he will be most remembered for. Paul was Tom’s rock, helping him to deal with his mother’s murder, then his brother's and father’s deaths.

In 2005, disaster struck for Paul, when his diabetes led to his left leg being amputated above the knee. Tom stayed by Paul’s bedside night and day, going on to become his sole permanent carer.

Two years ago, both Paul and Tom lost their jobs. As Tom is American, he received no income support whilst out of work and they used all of their savings to get by. Tom later found work, but the sole income had to pay for the pair of them, whilst also having to support his brother’s children, to whom he is legal guardian and simultaneously paying hefty rent on the bungalow that the couple were forced to move into due to Paul's ill-health.

Late last year, Paul suffered a stroke. In January 2020, he had a massive heart attack and then two more, the third being fatal. Tom is finding it extremely difficult to deal with Paul’s death, this being made all the worse by the authorities refusing to acknowledge him as Paul’s next of kin, even though Paul himself had listed Tom as such. Even though the couple were not married, they had spent nineteen years together and Tom was Paul’s sole carer. Despite this and despite him having remained constantly at Paul’s bedside during his time in hospital, in the eyes of the law, this stands for nothing. Tom had made provision for Paul's death by taking out an insurance policy, however, the insurance company refused to pay out as Paul died just six days shy of the minimum two-year period that the policy was required to be in place for prior to claiming. Tom has no money to arrange the funeral and as he is not Paul’s next of kin and is working, is not eligible to apply for state funding. We have contacted the Royal British Legion for help, as Paul was an ex-serviceman, but, again, as Tom is working, they have declined. In short, all options have been exhausted and other than Tom with-holding his rent, which will only make a terrible situation much worse, he has no means to pay.

We would love to give our friend Paul, a man who served on the front-line for his country, the send-off that he deserves and to help Tom, a person who has done so much to help others, a helping hand in his time of need. We would be so grateful for all donations and it will mean the world to Tom to be able to do this one last thing for Paul. We are hoping to raise £3700 to give Paul a decent and respectful farewell. The funeral has now been arranged, but with currently no way of funding it, the last things that should happen is for Tom to be forced into eviction in order to be able to pay for it.

We are looking to raise £3700. This is the cost of the actual funeral, which has been arranged through a small local firm. Tom has managed to find a celebrant who has offered her services free of charge and he will produce the Order of Service himself. There will be no cars, other than the hearse and spend on flowers will be minimal and not included in the £3700. We will be organising and paying for refreshments and the buffet at the wake ourselves.

There is now very little time to raise funds before the funeral, but the great news is that we have just been thrown a lifeline by the funeral company, who have now agreed that Tom can pay in instalments on a low interest-rate basis after the funeral, so please please if you can, carry on giving.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and hopefully donating. Any amounts, however large or small will make a difference and will be very gratefully received.

Love Tom's friends, Julie and Julia xx