The new Arsenal top has started to look at me with the kind of sultry glare which Prince would sing about. 

This is where you come in.

I don't usually get a name printed on the back of my shirts, in fact I never have. And other than a slight incline to have 'Ramsey' stamped across my back I would most likely have left my new Arsenal top in its deliciously naked state. However given the recent death of my Granddad from a stroke, and the previous deaths of  two other Grandparents from strokes, I thought I might be able to raise money for a cause I'm a little too familiar with.

So here we are, the future of my back is well an truly in your generous hands. Depending on the total donations recieved I will have a different name printed on my back, all suitably cringe worthy. 

Now I realise its a lot to ask you to donate for not a lot and I don't expect you to give £10, or even £5. Just £1 would be great. (If you want to give £10, feel free)

£0-£9 will get you RVP. A man leaving in disgrace, soon to have left.

£10-£19 will get you Nasri. Messy break up, he still calls when he's drunk.

£20-£29 buys Bale. The best player in the world, ever.

You may be thinking "these are a bit tame". Calm down young Jedi. The plot thickens

£30-£39 will buy you Adebayor; plastic furniture magnet.

£40-49 buys Suarez; buck toothed national anthem lover and genitalia impersonator extroardinaire.

£50-59 buys Barton; McDonalds pugilist/philosopher

£60-74 buys Terry; Great shagger, rubbish human.

£75-£100 buys Shawcross; Loves his mum, hates welsh bones.

And finally, over £100 would buy, well whoever you like really. I was thinking "Pulis"; the cap loving goblin prince. But we can have a vote if it gets that far.

Even if you just give £1, it would be cool to see how far this could go.

All donations will go to the charity. Cost of printing and the shirt itself will be paid for by me.