On September il be setting off on an epic 1500 mile solo bike ride 

Leaving London down to Portsmouth, where the ferry will take me over night to st.Marlo in France 

From here, hugging the west coast of France I'll make my way down to the pyrenees mountains crossing over the boarder in to Spain along the Col du Tourmalet, the highest paved mountain pass in the French Pyrenees, Well know for it's inclusion of the Tour de France.

From there il be cycling through central Spain  down to Malaga and on to the finish in Gibraltar 

Read my story for why I am doing this below

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Surrounded by nurses and doctors,
These were the last words I heard before i blacked out.


"I'm sorry we don't know what you have taken, anything we do to try and counteract the affects could have a negative reaction.
All we can do Greg is keep you on a drip and monitor you closely through the night"

At that moment Id never felt more alone

So afraid and horrified at what I'd done.

And It's truly difficult to even write this,
as I've never sat and stared it in the face
but this was the stark reality of it. 

It was only an hour earlier it happened

A week before my 20th birthday,
Sat alone,
drunk,
in the dark at 3 am

Feeling hopeless and overwhelmed,
the thought of my future being this endless cycle of misery and suffering 

In that moment, everything was fucked, everything in my life I'd been trying to cling on to came crashing down around me

At the time I felt like there was no one to turn to, 

Too ashamed and guilty to talk to my parents,
too paranoid to trust in my friends. 

I didn't think there was any hope for me

I broke

I decided to end it.

Emptying a large bottle of pills handful after handful,
swallowing them down with a swig of beer.
Tears streaming down my face snot hanging from my nose 

No more pain, no more fear, no more paranoia, no more depression,
I hate to say this but I felt free, for a moment I felt relieved 

But then it hit me, 

Never again would see my mom and feel the love of my mothers hug,
never again would I be able to geek out play computer games
with my dad, or laugh with my sister and make fun of each other.
Never would I able to do all the stupid stuff you can only do with you friends and get away with

It might be painfully obvious...

But I realised I didn't want to die

I just wanted all the pain to go away

I wanted to know that it was all going to be alright 

That there was hope for me.

And this is why I'm telling you this,

I don't believe anybody truely wants to take their own life

they just want the pain and suffering to stop

they want to find a way out

and hopefully by sharing my story I can make an impact. 

So more and more men know that
there are people out there they can talk to,
People that can help,
that want to help and that will help!

And with your help we can raises money to support the work CALM so
So they can keep on continuing the fight against male suicide and keep supporting those men that feel like the worlds is closing in around them and that they have no where to turn 

This life has so many incredible things to offer, for all of us!
So much love for us to feel, so much happiness and joy to be found, friends to make and memories to be made

I'm Living proof 

I survived 

I'm so fucking lucky to be here

But for so many,
they never get to see the other side of the storm,
They'll never see the clouds part to reveal the blue skies and the sunshine.
Never again will they feel love,
or see the smiles and hear the laughter of their loved ones

And I really hope that you can feel this
because it crushes me 

THIS CAN'T GO ON! 

We all have a chance to make a difference! 

So help Us 

Support me as I ride from London to Gibraltar on September 1st 

But more importantly show some support for CALM
And donate so they can continue to help support even more men in crisis

And please SHARE this so we can reach as far as possible! 

With your help we can make a difference! 

The Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM) is leading a movement against male suicide, the single biggest killer of men under 45 in the UK. Our goal is a life less miserable for you, your friends, your family and for all men.CALM PROVIDES>A free and anonymous helpline 0800 585858 and webchat (5pm-12am daily) staffed by trained professionals>Bereavement support >A website www.theCALMzone.net with inspiring content by men for men>Campaigns tackling stereotypes of masculinity, suicide and male mental health.Help us save lives