On a rainy day I was in a car crash, It took an hour and a half to cut me out the car and I was then taken in an air ambulance to hospital. I had broken my neck and ruptured my spleen which had to be removed. The things were not looking good but slowly my feeling is coming back and I plan to make a speedy recovery.

As I am currently incapacitated and for the first time in my life care not for my appearance I thought it is the perfect time to experiment with facial hair as I have always had a penchant for tashes.

Seen as I have lost my dignity (and loose a little more with every suppository I endure) I think it is only fair that you should all loose a small amount of yours by growing a tash and wearing it proudly in the real world and getting everyone you know to donate to this page.

I promise to rehabilitate myself as soon as possible which should be around 3-4 months - doctor’s estimation. On leaving hospital there will be a tash off party where the volume and weight of each tash will be measured with the winner receiving a spectacular prize.

Following the tash off we will offering one lucky buyer the chance to purchase all of the hair on eBay to raise extra cash for the air ambulance. We are accepting advanced closed bids so please get in touch if you’re interested.

If you need more of an incentive gents, listen to the commonly held global female perspective on tashes - I quote:

“Kissing a man without a moustache is like drinking champagne without bubbles”

If you cannot or will not grow a tash then you can still help to keep my spirits high by donating cash to the people who saved my life.