Sexual violence, abuse and exploitation can affect anyone regardless of age, gender or background. The impact is devastating; it can isolate individuals, fragment families and leave lifelong shame and a false sense of blame. Nexus has a vision of a society free from the trauma of sexual violence, by working with survivors to help them rebuild their lives and by raising awareness of sexual abuse and its consequences among professionals and the general public.

⬆️ This is what nexus want you to know about them, they let you know that what your feeling is okay and they can help victims to deal with all their feelings so that their lives can become bearable again no matter if it happened recently or decades ago.

1st February 2015. That was the day my whole world was turned upside down. I suddenly became a woman that would need the help of nexus.

I thought my life was amazing, I was at university in England and loving the student lifestyle. All of that changed on a night out when my drink was spiked. At first I couldn’t believe it had happened, i always thought, no way! I’m smart and sensible it would never happen to me. I could not have been more wrong.

I didn’t know what to do, I was stuck in Carlisle alone with no friends or family. I had no one to turn to. I couldn't tell my family over the phone because it wasn't fair to tell them over the phone hang up and leave them to deal with the bomb I had just dropped. 

My life suddenly stopped. I would just lie in my room and cry. I did tell my lecturer why wasn't attending my lectures, although there were sympathetic and understood, I was told that I’d have to try and find my own support as the university didn’t have the resources to help me.

Fast forward to just before Easter, I was told that although there were 2 more assignments to be handed in, there would be no more lectures. That's when I realised I could go home, there was no more material I would be getting and the assignments could be handed in online. I ended up not handing them in and dropping out, even though I loved my course, I couldn't deal with being in Carlisle anymore.

I was straight on through the phone to my mummy to get her to book me a ticket home. As soon as I got home my mummy could tell there was something wrong, I was avoiding her and drinking a lot more to self medicate with what had happened. Once I found the right time to tell my family, my mummy rang for an appointment to see my GP to get the help I clearly needed.

I had never heard of nexus until my GP had referred me to them. I know I've caused my family so much heartache with my mental health problems, self harming and suicide of attempts, so it hasn't just been me that has had to deal with this, it has also been my family and close friends.
Nexus has helped me to cope and understand what has happened with my mind and body since everything happened. They have also taught me techniques to use when I'm having a panic attack or sleep paralysis.

honestly I never thought something like this would never happen to me because I thought being fat protected me against men being attracted to me never mind anything else, boy was I wrong. I dropped out of university because of all of this and what I've written is honestly the very short version. I'm no writing this because I don't want to carry the shame of what had happened to me anymore so I'm speaking out so more people can come forward and not feel the guilt or be ashamed of what had happened to them

I wish we lived in a world that doesn't need an organisation like Nexus to exist but we do. I'm done with feeling the shame of what happened to me so I hope sharing my story will help keep other people safe from going through the same thing I did, I also want to try and help them help other people the way they helped me and countless others, as well as getting rid of the shame and taboo around sexual violence and assault.

I'm holding a pub quiz 31st August in the stables bar lurgan as well as a raffle with amazing prizes, everyone welcome xx