The life of someone who has loved someone suffering with mental illness, and this cruel disease which is addiction:

At first you are shocked - you had no idea this illness existed, or to the extent in which it has gripped you. It just appeared from nowhere. How did this happen? Youre just a normal person living a normal life - in love and full of life.

You begin to try and manage it. You think you can out-think it. To outsmart it. You try to out love it. There be some reasonable explanation behind it all? Surely you can be pragmatic and get to the bottom of it - everything will be fine, wont it?

Here comes the fight - you try to take the devil head on thinking you can somehow destroy it. But you cant. Its stronger than all of the strength combined, smarter than any well made plan, and more powerful than any known force. It breaks you over, and over again. You feel isolated, alone, and like there is no way out, and whats worse - you feel like you have nowhere to turn.

Words cannot describe the pain of watching someone you love desperately suffering, struggling, and slowly being consumed by this truly evil illness. Youre completely helpless, and so are they despite wanting to change more than you could ever imagine. Whats worse - you become as sick as the person who is active in addiction.

Youve tried everything - you have no options. The only choice is to concede defeat. You let go. You learn to understand the disease, and allow that person to find their way and heal themselves. The rest of the world thinks youve walked away, given up, or possibly that youre cruel - it couldnt be further from the truth. But, the most important person knows that youre doing it because you truly love them, and you live in hope that one day they will be free.

Stuart sadly lost his beautiful Bridge in September 2020.

Working together to break the stigma

We live in a world where mental illness is becoming more widely discussed, and there are many more resources available, and there is a greater acceptance than previous generations which has helped people understand, treat, and live with mental illnesses.

We are however very much in the dark ages when it comes to understanding the relationship between mental health, and addiction, and there are many very damaging viewpoints of what addiction really is, who it affects, as well as lacking support for sufferers.

Its time to break the stigma.

We wouldnt be able to profile someone who has been diagnosed with cancer just by looking at them, but yet we have this perception of what someone suffering with addiction looks like, but the reality is that it does not discriminate against anyone, and the harsh reality is that it takes some of the best lives away from us - even if they are still alive.

This misunderstanding regularly manifests itself into a lack of empathy towards both people struggling with addiction, those families affected by it, especially during bereavement. Addiction is NOT a sign of weakness, a lack of willpower, or unwillingness to stop, in fact in my experience - they are trying more than anyone could ever imagine.

The stigma associated with addiction makes it incredibly hard to open up, and seek help as someone either active in addiction, or as someone who dearly loves someone who is struggling with addiction. Nobody should ever feel ashamed, or guilty for either suffering with this disease, or know, or love someone who is struggling with addiction.

DrugFAM has been at the heart of breaking the stigma associated with addiction, and providing support for friends and families of loved ones who are either suffering with addiction, or who have sadly lost loved ones. They have enabled many partners, parents, children alike to have a safe space where they can openly share about their story, and understand that they are not alone.

DrugFAM is the home of the strongest, and most courageous people, who despite living through unimaginable pain have shown incredible humility, respect, and love.

Its time to break the stigma, and to bring the effects of addiction out in the open, so that sufferers - both in active addiction and families - can have a chance to heal.

Stuart has dedicated his health and fitness company - Caveman Conditioning to work in partnership with DrugFAM to raise awareness, and break the stigma associated with mental illness, and addiction for people suffering directly, and those families who are also too.