Alham Amer, 63, who lives on a Stepney green: ‘My home was repossessed because I could not afford my mortgage’

I became homeless when my marriage broke up. I had taken on a big mortgage and the interest rate went up. I became overstretched when my marriage ended. I had lost an income and then I also lost my job.

I was falling further and further behind on my debt repayments. Though I didn’t know it at the time, I think I was having a mental meltdown. I wasn’t able to cope and began drinking too much. I quit my job because I wasn’t happy with the way things were being run at the organization. I imagined I would quickly find another job, but it didn’t work out that way.

My home was repossessed because I couldn't afford my mortgage payments. More than that, the will had gone. You have a harder time thinking clearly when you're hit by a lot of things at once. All the time, you are fighting fires. Depression saps your energy, making it difficult to get up in the morning and devise a rational plan.

During that time, I stayed with friends as a stop-gap measure. It took a year for what was supposed to be temporary to become permanent. There was a long period when I was rudderless, moving from place to place.

The fact that I never had to live on the streets is an understatement. I was treated with such kindness and generosity by those who provided me with a roof over my head. But I felt like an intruder. “We are going out. There's food in the fridge. Help yourself. Do you know how remote works? "Don't wait," they would say.

I was very aware that it was not my home; my stuff wasn’t there and I made no decisions about anything. I was a guest. I would walk around the shopping center and the streets for hours hoping to exhaust myself, looking at empty allotments and wondering if I could live there.

There’s a feeling of powerlessness when you’re homeless; you feel lost. My experience changed how I saw homeless people. After a while I got over whatever it was that was going on in my head. I found a job and a flat and the friends who helped me are still, thankfully, my friends. But I have never got over the fear of homelessness, that feeling of being nowhere.

I am lucky that I now have a beautiful home in which I am very happy. I live on a narrowboat. I am warm and secure and it’s a lifestyle I enjoy – also, what with being retired, it’s a lifestyle I can afford. I know I can't afford to go back into the world and pay rent; the system is rotten. Homeless people have been victims of government policy over the past 20-30 years and it’s going to get worse.