following a freak accident whilst at a local equine centre, i got thrown off into the air like a rag doll.. it was the most traumatic experience I have ever encountered. After several mess ups with my health care & 11 endless weeks spent in hospital, with not correct care and no complete diagnosis other than a fracture to my neck C4 & two abnormalities in my spine, along with 2 brain tumours i was finally diagnosed by a spinal professional with having Cauda Equina Syndrome, i was living with this awful syndrome since the 27th july, after 13 days i then was sent home where 5 days later i was rushed by a blue lighted ambulance, i had caught Sepsis, my whole body was trying to shut itself down! This in itself was extremely traumatic along with the non functional legs, horrendous pain i was constantly in, the 2 brain tumours, the non functional bladder & bowels.. but long story short i am very lucky to be alive. When all i could say for just under a week was "help me, im going to die" after 10 further days i was still breathing, getting stronger each day. i was proud to say i made it!

Cauda Equina is essentially nerve compression and damage, causing paralysis and extreme pain to the waist downwards, in some cases such as mine it also affects my upper limbs, my arms & hands dont work to their full function. It means in my case i'm tetraplegic.. im a complicated case, with number of complicications along the way! Caudas Equina affects the bladders & bowels too. Some days are better than others but on bad days it can be so painful that I can only lay still on the hospital and take my strong pain killers and wait for the pain to go and sometimes the strong spasms & pains just don't go! So i'm just laid there dopey on morphine & still unable to move because it hurts so bad, the pain is so indescriable i wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy!

I was transferred to Sheffield Spinal Rehabilitation Unit on the 29th of september where I will learn how to cope and manage with this condition. All I hope for is to get home to my baby girl (neave who is 2.5), my family, friends, and most of all get home to be the best Mum I can be. Help is really needed for things like travel to and from the hospital for my family, friends and most of all my daughter to see me. I am 200 miles away from my home in suffolk where i've unfortunately had to give up due to not being suitable for my life in a wheelchair & unfortunately due to very little funds i couldnt afford to keep paying the big price tag of rent, as i've had to give my job up whilst in hospital, with my mum being off sick ill due to numerous things, whilst having to look after my daughter full time. Its extremely difficult for her too!

I need your help in Making my mums home my home, to make sure it is safe & acssesable for my return to normal family life. Making a temporary bedroom downstairs so I have somewhere to sleep safely. so i have somewhere to stay until i can raise enough funds for a new home for me and my daughter. So we can have somewhere to call our family home Without intruding in my parents house, where they dont have to give up their daily life to look after me.

As a very proud and fiercly independent 22 year old, single working Mum of 1, it is very difficult & embaressing for me to ask for your help, as many of you who know me. No matter what the situation is i will never ask for help for myself. I was so extremely independent before this happened to me and even as positive and determined a person as I am, the effects of this goes through my head daily, i am not one to give up and although how much i fight and push back i may not be able to fight this and I may be stuck with this syndrome, the inability to walk or control my upper limbs, the inability to control my bladder & bowels for the rest life. I won't give up on being strong though! I just want to be able to support my daughter & give her the best mummy i can be, by being able to take her on days out like we did before, i still want to be the fun silly mummy, who never said no to the days out my daughter so desperately wanted to go on. i need help, support & any little or big donation will help me get my specialsed wheelchair to give me that part of independence i am so dying to have.

I aim to help others also having, difficulties in their lives, once I am feeling a bit tougher both physically and mentally!! Any help via donations you can give would be totally incredibly amazing & every penny, or pound would mean less stress over how im going to afford my chair or how im going to cope without a chair or adaptions when i go home & it will help massively with the adaptions to my parents house, visits from my family to sheffield where i currently am 200 miles away, friends & my daughter whilst im doing my intense rehabilitation, to help me become somewhat fully independent to get back to being the daughter, mum, sister and friend I always have been, and will continue to be.

thank you for taking your time to read this all. Donate & spread the word.. It means the abosolute world :)

xox Love Always Sammy xox