In Memory of my Husband Andrew O'Brien, Consultant Spine Surgeon
Krystyna O'Brien is raising money for Cancer Research UK
In memory of Andrew O'brien
Story
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My Husband Andrew Charles O'Brien BDS, FDS RCS(Eng), MB BS, MRCS(Eng) FRCS(Tr&Orth), Consultant Spinal Surgeon in Complex Adult and Paediatric Spinal Deformity and Spinal Tumour at The Royal Belfast Hospital for Sick Children and the Royal Victoria Hospital, Belfast, former Senior Spine Fellow (Post-CCT) at the Royal National Orthopaedic Hospital, Stanmore, died at 9.05am on Friday 28th September 2018 in St Catherine's Hospice, Crawley, at the age of 54, after a 10-week battle with Malignant Metastatic Melanoma Stage 4, with unknown primary, which had metastasised throughout his spine.
He was so devoted to his work and the care of his patients, that his diagnosis came out of the blue and as a total and devastating shock. Ten horrendous exhausting weeks ensued as we went from hospital to hospital: the Royal Marsden in Sutton, the Royal Marsden in Chelsea, the East Surrey Hospital in Redhill, The Royal National Orthopaedic Hospital in Stanmore, and finally to St Catherine's Hospice in Crawley. Hope was constantly raised and dashed throughout the entire ten weeks, leaving our daughters, Anna and Heli, and myself exhausted and with an ongoing form of PTSD. I also had an extreme stress related bleed which required hospital attention.
When I asked Andy if he knew about his cancer, he said yes, about two weeks prior to his diagnosis, but that he didn't want to believe it. He had had a serious RTA in 2001, which had snapped his spine. We therefore attributed his increasing back pain to it and to ageing. He was taking Lemsip for what he told us were flu-like symptoms. For two years, brown staining had developed on his cheeks. We were told only when at the Royal Marsden in Chelsea, where Andy received his one and only dose of Immunotherapy, that this was a sign of cancer. Throughout all this, he continued to work with a focus and dedication second to none. On 18th July, while in clinics, he was sweating profusely and in tremendous pain in his lower back. His nurse Dee insisted on him having a scan, which led to another and another. His colleagues then sat him down in front of his images. They said that he sat there for the longest time, and that his only concern was for our daughters, Anna, Heli and me. The next day Andrew sent me a text asking me to pick him up from Gatwick: our home is in Sussex, and we divided our time between here and Belfast. He broke the news to us when we arrived home, after which our life took a devastating turn, which we could never have envisaged and which changed our lives and world forever. Andrew obviously knew what was happening to his body, and after receiving his final diagnosis, he himself told Anna, Heli and me that he had only 8 short weeks left to live.
Three and a half years later, I am now ready to do something I've intended to do since Andy died. Our daughters Anna and Heli and I are climbing the Three Peaks, starting with Snowdon. After this I will be doing a Wing Walk and other challenges. Due to our vastly different working and on-duty hours - Anna's a Criminal Defence Lawyer, and Heli's at the Royal Veterinary College - it's a struggle to find a mutually convenient time to do this in one go, so we will be climbing all three peaks over the cause of three weekends this summer.
Andrew was born on 6th June 1964 in Canterbury, Kent. He lived in Preston and later in Cooper Street with his late parents, Terry and Barbara, his brother Timothy and his sister Catherine, and attended Sir Roger Manhoods School in Sandwich. Andrew's family then moved to a farm in High Halden.
Andrew loved flying and was passionate about anything and everything to do with aeroplanes, especially the Spitfire. Trained to fly by the late Ted Girdler of the Red Arrows, Andrew gained his PPL at the age of 16 from Thanet Flying Club in Manston. He also helped run the flying school with the Girdler family, and trained the air cadets, with a tremendous impact on results. He was accepted into the RAF's Volunteer Reserve and was earmarked to fly the Tornado, but was unable to pursue this career due to his asthma. Andrew therefore went to Dental School in 1985 to study for his Bachelor in Dental Surgery (BDS).
He first studied at Guy's and Thomas', and this is when we met in 1985. We were both living in Commonwealth Hall of Residence, Cartwright Gardens in Bloomsbury, London: I was staying on the 2nd Floor and Andrew was on the ground floor. Andrew then transferred to Barts and The London School of Medicine and Dentistry.
After graduation, Andrew took up his House Officer position at The Bristol Royal Infirmary for six months, where we lived in Hospital Accommodation from January to June 1993. We then moved to the Isle of Wight for three months for Andrew to take up a locum position in Ryde while waiting for his Senior House Officer contract in Maxillofacial Surgery to begin at the Queen Victoria Hospital, East Grinstead. After a year in Hospital Accommodation, we moved into our permanent family home in East Grinstead: I was now three months pregnant with our first daughter, Anna.
Andrew went on to study for the Bachelor of Medicine, Bachelor of Surgery (MBBS) at University College London Medical School, as a pre-requisite for career progression in Maxillofacial Surgery. During this time, we completed our family with the birth of our second daughter, Helena.
Rather than returning to Maxillofacial Surgery, Andrew moved into Orthopaedic Surgery and was accepted onto the South East Thames Training Rotation. He studied for his MSc (T&O) at the University of Brighton, and for several years was on the interview panel selecting prospective medial school students. Andrew then did his Fellowship at the Royal National Orthopaedic Hospital in Stanmore, before accepting a locum position in Belfast, which transferred into a Substantive Consultant position in 2015.
Andrew loved his work, particularly with the children. His patients and colleagues report that his care was exemplary and holistic, focusing not just on surgical intervention but on the needs of the whole person and the family, and that they felt safe in his hands. His ground-breaking work and surgical expertise are greatly missed, as is his compassion, kindness, thoughtfulness, generosity, intelligence, creativity, storytelling, and sense of humour. He was a visionary and very keen to innovate and develop new services. The Paediatric Neurology Department at the Royal Belfast Hospital for Sick Children is continuing his work as a legacy.
Andrew was a gifted teacher and excellent public speaker. He held the title of Honorary Lecturer at various universities and institutions worldwide, including at Queen's University in Belfast. His students still comment on the impact he had on their knowledge and work, and how they continue to draw heavily on his words of wisdom.
Andrew was a respected and influential member of many of his professional bodies. As Chairman of the BMA Junior Doctors Committee, it was clear he wanted to do his best by his profession and he worked hard to uphold junior doctors' rights in a time of great uncertainty and threat. Later, Andrew's sense of humour and deep regard for the medical profession were front and centre in his work with the BMA Consultants' Committee in Northern Ireland, where he made invaluable contributions, including setting their strategy for the next five years. Andrew's huge personality coupled with his dry sense of humour meant meetings were always fun and extremely productive.
Alongside his professional work, Andrew was in the throes of launching two new global companies: 'Bioregenerative Technologies' and 'Neurospinal Innovations', for which Andrew was CEO and Founder, and which had a launch date set for June 2019. He was fast-tracked through the 'HS Live' Start-Ups selection process having pitched and progressed to the investment stage. Andrew's visionary plans for revolutionising treatment stemmed again from his deep care and concern for his patients, and his loss is felt in circles around the world.
Deeply principled, kind and caring, Andrew was a true gentleman, with a beautiful smile and light in his eyes. He was always full of fun and playfulness. Ever-patient, open and friendly, Andrew did his best for everyone and was always there when needed. Nothing was too much trouble and he always made time. He was a walking encyclopaedia with a vast wealth of knowledge, and would go to great lengths to fix everything. He was a born teacher, lecturing, sharing and helping others to succeed. Stubborn, passionate, and endlessly thoughtful, Andrew was unique and tremendously loved. He was a great family man, a wonderful Husband and a brilliant Father, and is greatly missed.
Andrew was a bright and brilliant star, and was taken when he still had so much to give to the world and so much left to do. He lives on in us his family, in his friends, and in his patients, and in the hearts and memories of everyone whose lives he touched.