Marta, my and my brother Tom's mum, was affectionate in a distinctly un-British way, who embarrassingly sang songs we didn't know the lyrics to (I suspect she didn't either) around the house, was our beloved fuss-pot, and a mother we are blessed to have had. After five years, I think my brother would agree with me that she is still sorely missed by all who knew her. A brilliant psychologist from Brazil, she met my father on a coach whilst he was studying for his thesis, and moved to the UK with him despite not speaking a word of English, yet learnt the language, worked hard so that her qualifications were recognised and respected, and trained and inspired many counsellors after her. On top of all this, she was our mum: she told us off when we misbehaved, hugged and kissed us when we were down, or simply when she felt like it, laughed and played with us, and celebrated our achievements with us. I love her, miss her, and was and is extremely proud of her.

When I was fifteen, she found out she had a tumour in her salivary gland, and despite repeated operations and radiotherapy it spread to her lungs, and eventually infected most of her major organs. She finally passed away in a Martletts hospice on Easter Monday 2006, 17th April. During those three years, despite the cancer and intensive chemotherapy, we still managed to travel all over Europe, visiting places such as Sicily, Paris, the Dolomites and Dubrovnik. Throughout her sickness, she never let the cancer interfere with seeing her friends, enjoying good (and expensive) food, gardening in the summer and walking with her family. It is a testament to her love of life that she was brave enough to try experimental treatments to prolong her time. It is a terrible thing to see someone so passionate about the good things in life waste away in such a horrible, undiginified way.

To mark the fifth anniversary of her passing away, I'd like to do something to mark how we have come on our lives since, and to make some life changes. Sussex is a beautiful, stunning corner of England, a place she was happy to call home. We enjoyed many walks along the South Downs on many a Sunday afternoon. My brother has found a passion for camping, and now works at a outdoors/equipment store in Brighton whilst awaiting the start of a practical film studies course of the University of Portsmouth. I have recently returned from travelling and working around the world, and am now working full time whilst I contemplate the next chapter of my life, content in the knowledge that I'm young and don't need to be in a rush to figure out the next step, whilst looking forward to being able to focus and aim strong when I am certain what I want to do. I'm also uncomfortably unfit, and miss the days when I was more physically active.

So, to combine Tom's love of hiking and my will to get in shape, I aim to walk the entire length of the South Downs in a week, finishing on the 17th of April 2011 at the Seven Sisters, to celebrate how far we have come, and remember our great mum with fondness and pride.

Please donate all that you can, so that, in the future, there are fewer people whose childhoods are dominated by memories of suffering and grief, so that fewer mothers are torn from their families, so that we can beat this 'conniving bastard of a disease'.

Many thanks,

Marie 'Tamogochi' Taguchi-Porteous and Thomas 'Tom' Porteous

 

 

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