Had I known what 2016 had in store for my family and I, we would have done things a lot differently. God I wish I could turn back the clock.

Truth is stress, anxiety, and in general life in the 21st century has got a lot to answer for. Hearing the phone ring one morning, and before hearing anything even the tone of my husbands voice, I just felt something sink in the pit of my stomach..... my sister had just died of a Heart Attack. Young, determined and beautiful.... we did not ever expect such a thing to happen.....my Dad completely crushed .... he was never the same from that moment.... seeing him crying with his head in his palms.... no dad should see what he saw.

9 Months later with us all trying to understand what happened to Tash but knowing stress and anxiety had something to do with it, I was in my workshop making Christmas wreaths, I got the call to say dads having a heart attack. Typing this as I speak makes me feel sick to the stomach. My hands shaking, and I'm crying. This moment is a repeat of my sister, how can this happen again? I ran with my 6 year old daughter to my dads house, shielding my daughter from my dad. The ambulance there but struggling, tubes, machines pumping my dads chest, seeing him lifeless and me screaming ( I can't even explain why I was doing this, shock does strange things) and holding my dad not wanting to let go. The air ambulance ran in after 10 minutes of the ambulance being there....they took over and for a split second I had hope. They tried  a 3rd time, but the rest you already know. I can still hear the sound of those machines, it haunts me and I never got to say thank you and goodbye.

So I decided to take control of life, because the bastard took mine and my soul in 2016. I'm running and training for a half marathon, but wanted to raise money in the meantime. I struggle to pick between charities from Mind (I really feel if we sort out mental health, there would be a reduction in heart attacks, clots form due to stress. Better mental health services would avoid drug and alcohol addiction, unemployment and more) and British Heart Foundation for their research. But the one which I feel appropriate is the East Anglian Ambulance, it's non funded, and if I can help your mum, dad, son, daughter etc who's been in a car crash, and need emergency treatment or god forbid you are having a heart attack, these are the people you need in that instance.

So December 16th, I will not let you screw me this year, I'm shaving my hair and creating awareness, yes it's cold, yes I may look like right said Fred but quite frankly I don't give a shit! Jaymz Marsters thank you for voluntering your time, means alot! 

Donate a £1, and it will truly mean the world to me and those that need the East Anglian Air Ambulance and support this wonderful life saving, non funded cause. 

Thank you for listening & supporting.

Sis and Dad you will always be remembered. 🦋🐝