Robert Jewsbury
Rob's Sponsor a Poem Page for Citizens Advice North Herts
Fundraising for Citizens Advice North Hertfordshire
Story
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Citizens Advice
Sometimes people encounter challenges and problems that they don’t know how to deal with, and they need help to overcome. People need different types of support at various times in their life.
Citizens Advice aim to help everyone in society that needs them. The people they serve through their local network are often among the most disadvantaged in society with the greatest needs; people with a higher than average likelihood of suffering from depression.
This is why I am supporting them.
My Poem
I have chosen "Dare" by Jeff Foster.
Today...
Dare to allow yourself to be seen.
Dare to tell the truth.
Dare to stop pretending.
Dare to tell the truth.
Dare to stop pretending.
Dare to stay present to the secret fire that burns inside.
Dare to be wildly inconsistent.
Dare to let another in.
Dare to let go of the image.
Dare to never be prepared.
Dare to give everything for the awakening of love.
Dare to fail.
Dare to mess everything up.
Dare to fall to the ground, humbled again, laughing.
Dare to dream and let dreams die.
Dare to honour the past but not cling to it.
Dare to give an honest Yes and an honest No.
Dare to be wrong.
Dare to be right.
Dare to be real.
Dare to be here.
...Today.
I am moved by many of the poems and prose of Jeff Foster (http://www.lifewithoutacentre.com/).
My Story
I've never read poetry in public before. I'm not even a big fan of poetry!
But every so often, I'll read a poem that moves me greatly - because it resonates with my own experience and feelings. "Dare" is one such poem. It describes not concealing or suppressing one's feelings and emotions; first and foremost, it describes being true to oneself.
It describes actions, many of which I rarely did from when I was in my teens until about 5 years ago. As a result, I concealed and suppressed feelings and emotions of:
- Hurt, violation, shame and guilt
- Love and passion
- Regret and sorrow
- Frustration, anger and resentment
- Inferiority and inadequacy
- Happiness and bliss
It's very likely that the concealment and suppression of these feelings was the main cause of the depression from which I have suffered for over 30 years (and also migraines for around 35 years).
Depression isn't sadness. For me, depression is an almost unbearable lethargy which saps my motivation to do anything, talk to anyone, and decide anything.
For most of these 30 years, my depression has been controlled by medication. Also, early on I discovered, through homeopathy, that the depression was much worse when my diet contained sugar. So I avoid normal sugar - fruit sugar is ok.
It wasn't until 2009 that I started to explore psychological counselling as an alternative way of treating my depression. This led to me identifying events and circumstances in my life that were potential causes for the depression - events and circumstances where I concealed and suppressed the feelings and emotions mentioned earlier.
Counselling also introduced me to Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) which I find very valuable. It's a technique for analysing thoughts, and the feelings they generate, to determine whether they are rational; and, if they are not (which is often the case) then to determine a more rational thought and the corresponding new, more positive, feeling.
Other strategies that I usually find effective in either preventing or countering an episode of depression include regular aerobic exercise, adhering to my sugar-free diet, avoiding excessive stress, not getting excessively tired, and dancing at 5Rhythms classes.
First and foremost, I try to live my life so that I'm true to myself. This is why I am daring to recite "Dare".
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