In May 2019 my wife Jayne felt a random pain across her chest which caused her to check her breasts.  Suddenly, I saw fear in her eyes as she doubled back on one breast to feel again after finding something unusual.  She asked me to feel it too and sure enough we agreed that there was a lump and we needed to contact our GP the next day.

After having a check up the doctor immediately referred Jayne to a breast care specialist.  Upon initial examination we were told that medically speaking the lump showed all the characteristics of a cyst rather than tumour and to not fear the worst - but further tests would be done to be certain.

The irony at this point was that the consultant advised the initial pain Jayne had felt, was in no way linked to the lump and more a typical symptom ladies of a certain age get from time to time as part of menopausal change, so it was a pure slice of luck (or was it) that this unrelated pain was enough to make Jayne check her breasts on that day.

After an initial mammogram and ultrasound scan, the radiologist strongly felt that the lump wasn't a cyst and it was agreed a biopsy should be done.  His instinct was correct and the result confirmed later that it was a malignant tumour approximately 2.5cm in size.

Further results told us Jayne had triple negative breast cancer - one of the more stubborn and difficult types to treat (just her luck - there's that word again).

Jayne underwent a lumpectomy to remove the tumour along with four lymph nodes and surgery went well - at least we believed so at the time.  The lymph nodes showed no sign of cancer cells, indicating that the cancer spread had been stopped before it began and the tumour removed in full with a good margin of healthy surrounding tissue also taken for extra precaution.

Jayne then endured six months of gruelling follow up chemotherapy and a further three weeks of intensive radiotherapy all as part of a plan to make sure "they got it all".  It was a hell of a difficult nine months for Jayne but she faced it head on and didn't let it crush her spirit despite the inevitable side effects of hair loss, finger nail loss and the repeated sickness and exhaustion it brought with it.

Due to evidence of family history of breast cancer, Jayne was put forward for gene testing and three months later we had confirmation that Jayne did indeed have a faulty BRCA2 gene - something which she had a 50% chance of having passed down to the children whom also now need to have gene testing for their own screening benefits.  It's also possible they could be carriers that could pose risk to their own children too.

Twelve months on from the initial diagnosis Jayne then had her annual follow up mammogram in May of last year.  We attended the appointment with apprehension in case of bad news, so you could imagine our utter relief when the result came back clear - "no more cancer" we thought, "you beat it Jayne" I cried, and we looked forward to the future with so much positivity especially having become grandparents for the first time just a few months earlier in February.

Then just two short months later, Jayne began having trouble with discomfort around her tummy and upper thigh - possibly two unrelated issues.  A call to the GP surgery followed but due to COVID-19 we were offered telephone appointment only and advised to manage with pain medication and review in a couple of weeks.  Those weeks passed with little improvement and in mid July Jayne collapsed in pain at home and had to be taken to A&E by ambulance before spending nine long days in an acute assessment ward.  COVID-19 meant she could only have one visitor per day for a maximum of one hour.  She felt scared and alone and we couldn't comfort her the way she needed.

After various scans Jayne got told the news wasn't good - she called me and after a small battle with the administration team they allowed me to attend the hospital ward early so we could face the full truth of the findings together - the cancer was back! But how?  The Mammogram was clear and so were the lymph nodes they'd removed last year.

Scans showed legions and tumours in Jayne's Liver, Lungs and Spine - hence the multi site pain she had been experiencing.  All three sites are commonly associated with secondary breast cancer spread (a fourth site commonly associated is the brain which we'll get to later).

We were subsequently told by a consultant oncologist that the prognosis was terminal, no cure could be offered, simply treatment to try and slow the progression and we had to face the hammer blow that life expectancy was minimal given in just weeks without treatment or possibly months if Jayne responded well to chemotherapy.

We didn't expect to see Christmas together, but thankfully we got there with Jayne in relative good health up until mid December.  Having then started with vision problems, Jayne had a CT scan which confirmed spread to the brain - the fourth commonly associated spread site.

Post Christmas Jayne's decline became rapid and brutal.  The impact of multiple brain tumours caused her vision problems, confusion and loss of balance.  This was soon followed by a loss of the ability to speak or respond with anything more than a gentle return hand squeeze and complete loss of bladder control - you could say we'd already lost Jayne at that point even though she remained physically with us.  Jayne was bed ridden and heavily reliant on morphine pain relief and the utterly amazing care of NHS/Macmillan palliative care nurses to attend to her personal needs.

On the 30th January 2021 Jayne lost her battle for life at our family home surrounded by myself, our children and her elderly parents - our hearts collectively shattered but relieved as one that her suffering had been ended.

So for Jayne the battle was lost - but our children could be BRCA2 gene carriers and their futures shrouded by increased risk.  I'm therefore asking for your support in helping to raise much needed funds for Breast Cancer Now in the fight for earlier detection and better treatment options.  How did Jayne's cancer spread?  It travelled in the blood for which no current testing methods can identify rogue cells in the blood stream - there was simply no way of catching it before it spread.

Please help me to help other Breast Cancer sufferers and their families in Jayne's memory.

Thank you.

Andrew, Charlotte, Jacob, Thomas and baby Reuben.

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