Danielle Oshaughnessy
#TeamDanyl
Fundraising for St Oswald's Hospice Limited
Story
Thanks for taking the time to visit #TeamDanyl's JustGiving page.
If you have been following our story you will know that during pregnancy it was discovered that Danyl (twin 2) had many severe heart defects. His defects were incurable and we were advised to terminate as they were the most severe defects and the outlook didn't look good.
Looking back at that initial diagnosis seems like a life time ago. Our heads were full of questions about Danyl's defects but we had the added stress of finding out what each decision would mean for his twin. Once we had the full diagnosis we decided we would go through with the pregnancy. We felt we needed to give Dylan the best chance of survival and we really wanted to meet Danyl. We were scanned every other week to check on their progress. The weeks ticked by (even though we felt like we were stood still and time was passing around us) and things stayed relatively stable. We were told we would deliver the twins at 28 weeks, I actually went to 38 weeks and only moved the date by one day so they weren't born on Friday 13th. I'm not superstitious but I just felt we had enough bad luck and didn't need anymore! There were times when I was told both babies were in danger and we honestly didn't know who was going to come out of the pregnancy. The doctors expected Danyl to have other problems with different organs but he didn't! This meant they were then concerned for Dylan's organs. That scan will forever be etched in my mind. I don't think I took a single breath the whole time it was happening! Luckily all other organs looked healthy so we continued and just hoped for the best. As time went on and Danyl remained stable our plans constantly changed and when I was 32 weeks pregnant we were told he would survive weeks and we would be allowed to take him home.
St. Oswald's supported us through this difficult journey and we had a plan in place so that when the twins were born we could stay at St. Oswald's until Danyl died.
Thursday 12th October 2017 - the twins were born at RVI, Newcastle and again Danyl was scanned. The full diagnosis was correct but it was at this point we were told we could go home in a couple of days and be supported in the community - the support from St. Oswald's was still there and we could be transferred to the hospice at any point.
However, Danyl had different ideas to any professional. He outlived any time line we were given! As a family we celebrated Christmas, birthdays, Easter, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Uncle Craig's wedding and we celebrated every milestone he allowed us to be part of, including turning 1. We heard him babble, giggle and belly laugh. We watched him learn and grow. We got to feed him solids and find out which foods he loved. We had to learn how to maximise calorie intake pretty quickly. We found out he loved Moana (This was Oliver's favourite film) and trains. We were able to take him on days out and create precious memories with him.
Life was good but we always knew our lives could change in an instant!
That 'instant' came on Monday 22nd October 2018 at 12.39pm. Danyl woke up that day and it was just like any other day. Oliver had been to nursery, Dylan was playing with the musical instruments, my mum had just finished mopping my floors and Kev had just passed me Danyl to hold and feed so he could go and make a coffee. I fed him his bottle, he took his milk and then he wouldn't take his dummy! He loved his dummy so I tried to give him it again and again he refused, it was at this point I actually said out loud, 'Danyl's not well today and I think he is going to die.' With that I cuddled him in, sang him a song and he died in my arms, peacefully and completely surrounded by love!
In true Danyl style all of the things that were supposed to happen didn't, proving that he did everything his own way in pregnancy, in life and in death! There was no change in his numbers (he was checked the night before and everything was his normal), there was no change in his feeding or his nappy output. In a way I am at peace with that because we didn't have to administer any drugs and we didn't have to see any changes take place.
St Oswald's have been involved with us since pregnancy and are still involved. We could have taken Danyl into the hospice at any point. We received pre-bereavement counselling before their birth. Since Danyl died, Oliver goes every week for play therapy. He gets to talk about Danyl and make sense of what happened. Dylan can access this in the future too! Our family can access bereavement counselling and this will always be available to us!
For that reason we have developed #TeamDanyl, to raise as much money as possible for St. Oswald's, in Danyl's name. The team are running the GNR, some have ran the run before and others are doing it for the very first time! I (Danielle) am not running because when we put the team together life was different but I would like to say a massive thank you to every that is running and to everyone who donates and shares our story. It means so much to us.
Watch out for our other events, we are hoping to raise lots of money and make Danyl proud.
Thank you for putting yourself forward to run and join in with the events as well as sharing and donating to our page #forDanyl.
Good Luck #TeamDanyl and Happy Fundraising xxx
Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Your details are safe with JustGiving - they'll never sell them on or send unwanted emails. Once you donate, they'll send your money directly to the charity. So it's the most efficient way to donate - saving time and cutting costs for the charity.
If you have been following our story you will know that during pregnancy it was discovered that Danyl (twin 2) had many severe heart defects. His defects were incurable and we were advised to terminate as they were the most severe defects and the outlook didn't look good.
Looking back at that initial diagnosis seems like a life time ago. Our heads were full of questions about Danyl's defects but we had the added stress of finding out what each decision would mean for his twin. Once we had the full diagnosis we decided we would go through with the pregnancy. We felt we needed to give Dylan the best chance of survival and we really wanted to meet Danyl. We were scanned every other week to check on their progress. The weeks ticked by (even though we felt like we were stood still and time was passing around us) and things stayed relatively stable. We were told we would deliver the twins at 28 weeks, I actually went to 38 weeks and only moved the date by one day so they weren't born on Friday 13th. I'm not superstitious but I just felt we had enough bad luck and didn't need anymore! There were times when I was told both babies were in danger and we honestly didn't know who was going to come out of the pregnancy. The doctors expected Danyl to have other problems with different organs but he didn't! This meant they were then concerned for Dylan's organs. That scan will forever be etched in my mind. I don't think I took a single breath the whole time it was happening! Luckily all other organs looked healthy so we continued and just hoped for the best. As time went on and Danyl remained stable our plans constantly changed and when I was 32 weeks pregnant we were told he would survive weeks and we would be allowed to take him home.
St. Oswald's supported us through this difficult journey and we had a plan in place so that when the twins were born we could stay at St. Oswald's until Danyl died.
Thursday 12th October 2017 - the twins were born at RVI, Newcastle and again Danyl was scanned. The full diagnosis was correct but it was at this point we were told we could go home in a couple of days and be supported in the community - the support from St. Oswald's was still there and we could be transferred to the hospice at any point.
However, Danyl had different ideas to any professional. He outlived any time line we were given! As a family we celebrated Christmas, birthdays, Easter, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Uncle Craig's wedding and we celebrated every milestone he allowed us to be part of, including turning 1. We heard him babble, giggle and belly laugh. We watched him learn and grow. We got to feed him solids and find out which foods he loved. We had to learn how to maximise calorie intake pretty quickly. We found out he loved Moana (This was Oliver's favourite film) and trains. We were able to take him on days out and create precious memories with him.
Life was good but we always knew our lives could change in an instant!
That 'instant' came on Monday 22nd October 2018 at 12.39pm. Danyl woke up that day and it was just like any other day. Oliver had been to nursery, Dylan was playing with the musical instruments, my mum had just finished mopping my floors and Kev had just passed me Danyl to hold and feed so he could go and make a coffee. I fed him his bottle, he took his milk and then he wouldn't take his dummy! He loved his dummy so I tried to give him it again and again he refused, it was at this point I actually said out loud, 'Danyl's not well today and I think he is going to die.' With that I cuddled him in, sang him a song and he died in my arms, peacefully and completely surrounded by love!
In true Danyl style all of the things that were supposed to happen didn't, proving that he did everything his own way in pregnancy, in life and in death! There was no change in his numbers (he was checked the night before and everything was his normal), there was no change in his feeding or his nappy output. In a way I am at peace with that because we didn't have to administer any drugs and we didn't have to see any changes take place.
St Oswald's have been involved with us since pregnancy and are still involved. We could have taken Danyl into the hospice at any point. We received pre-bereavement counselling before their birth. Since Danyl died, Oliver goes every week for play therapy. He gets to talk about Danyl and make sense of what happened. Dylan can access this in the future too! Our family can access bereavement counselling and this will always be available to us!
For that reason we have developed #TeamDanyl, to raise as much money as possible for St. Oswald's, in Danyl's name. The team are running the GNR, some have ran the run before and others are doing it for the very first time! I (Danielle) am not running because when we put the team together life was different but I would like to say a massive thank you to every that is running and to everyone who donates and shares our story. It means so much to us.
Watch out for our other events, we are hoping to raise lots of money and make Danyl proud.
Thank you for putting yourself forward to run and join in with the events as well as sharing and donating to our page #forDanyl.
Good Luck #TeamDanyl and Happy Fundraising xxx
Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Your details are safe with JustGiving - they'll never sell them on or send unwanted emails. Once you donate, they'll send your money directly to the charity. So it's the most efficient way to donate - saving time and cutting costs for the charity.