'Everesting' is a cycling challenge where you ride up & down the same hill until you've climbed a total equal to the height of Mount Everest (8,848 metres / 29,030 ft). 'Trenching' is an even more enduring task of descending the depths of the Marianna Trench (11,034 m / 36,201 ft) in one ride. Sounds easy - but you have to do the uphill riding part too!

A cobblestone / pavé street has now been Everested and Trenched for the first time ever!

Check out my ride data, report and photos here: https://www.strava.com/activities/3763413321

Since I came to Norway, I’ve been thinking about what to do that could be special. After coming across Damstredet whilst doing deliveries, I became intrigued by the old pretty buildings, the flowers and the cobbles. It’s a short, sharp climb that kicks up to about 15% at the bottom and doesn’t ease off that much. It only has a gain of around 12 metres but the vibrations of the cobbles sap your energy enough to make it feel longer and steeper. After some brainstorming and contemplation, I decided I’d try and Everest this sucker. For those who don't know, Everesting is repeating the same climb until you climb the equivalent of Mount Everest (8,848m / 29,030 ft) in one ride. And then there's now Trenching, repeating the same climb until you descend the depths of the Mariana Trench (11,034m / 36,201 ft) in one ride - whilst still having to do the climbing part too, naturally.

After doing some recon rides using an iPhone and Android, I got recording of 8 to 9 metres per rep - maybe 10 metres if I was lucky. But these gains are calculated using the GPS position against a base map of elevation data, so it isn’t perfect, especially if your phone likes to get whacky with it’s location. For the real thing, I’d use a dedicated device with barometric recording (thanks, Chris). This way, the elevation gain isn’t dependent on having precise location data. I'd also aim for 1,000 reps so I could be sure that even on the lower-end of the elevation stats it would be an Everest - plus four-figures of reps just sounds ludicrous. Some official Norwegian survey data for the hill gives 22m elevation for the bottom and a little over 35m for where I was turning. It's just safe to say, phones suck if you want to get vertical gains recorded.

I started riding at 5am on the dot, after getting about 5 hours sleep. I had been averaging about 1 minute per rep in training, and 1000 minutes is 16.7 hours so I knew I wouldn’t be there all day… right? Because of the steepness of the climb and the fact I was taking this on with a singlespeed bike set-up with 24/20 gearing (looks stupidly small but is still wildly too big) I didn’t really have a choice to ride ‘slow’. If my cadence dropped too low, I would stall out so I had to keep the pressure on almost the whole way up the climb - over and over and over. My lower back got absolutely destroyed towards the end of it all due to this.

I picked my day perfectly. The weather was still, sunny-to-overcast, maxing out at just over 20C. I don’t think I could have asked for better conditions for a hill (mountain) climbing session. I set up a little base camp next to a bench halfway up the climb with all the supplies I’d need for the expedition. Electronics, extra layers of clothing, tools (including spare brake pads), enough calories to feed a small army and some all-important high-sugar caffeinated cola for the later stages of the event. This was my third time Everesting, so I was well aware of all the necessities that are required which may not cross your mind the first time around. You want to make sure you have absolutely everything you’ll require for the 18-24 hours on-site or very closely accessible. A little bit of extra wasted time adds up dramatically.

I took it as easy as I could at first. It’s sometimes difficult to avoid getting excited and racing - but it’s a marathon, not a sprint. It’s about surviving the distance, not getting it done as fast as possible. At least for mortals like me, anyway. I broke my first 240 repeats into sets of 80 with 10-15 minute breaks in between to have some snacks and drink some water. I wasn’t carrying any supplies whilst riding. A few friends started to come by as I got into the flow of riding. It was a huge help to pass the time climbing and chatting. Focusing too heavily on the task at hand can destroy you mentally as it is almost incomprehensible. Just sit back and enjoy riding your bike.

I was soon hitting 333 reps, one-third of the way to my goal, so decided to pull in and have a break. However, at this point the bike computer I was using decided to crash and delete all of the ride data I had been recording for the last 5+ hours. What a blow to my esteem. But this isn’t my first rodeo, so I was of course recording on my phone too, as a back-up. I wasn’t going to let this keep me down though - but it did suck. It meant my final upload will probably have a massively underestimated elevation total and that was a bitter pill to swallow. I reluctantly started a new ride on the device and got going again after some stressful Googling seeing if I could recover the file somehow - unsuccessful.

Next up was 420 reps. Then 500. The halfway point. According to the average gain I was making per rep, I would be hitting Everest (8,848m / 29,030ft) at around 780 reps. I was almost there. But 11 hours had elapsed since I began. This realisation that I was going slower than I thought, feeling like I was slacking by taking too long on breaks and the daunting potential of spending another 11+ hours on the street, deep into the night, started to weigh on my conscience. Needless to say, I was surrounded by great people and I cracked on. All downhill from here, I guess?

580… Got my first caffeine hit of the ride courtesy of Lee with some local Tøyen Cola which felt like rocket fuel... 667… A smidge over two-thirds of the way to the four-figure rep count. This is where the momentum really hit me hard. Everest was within striking distance and I had less than 50% of what I had already ridden to do. I decided to do a set of 123 reps to take me all the way past 8,848m and to my fastest ever time to complete an Everesting ride. The Sun was setting and I find myself being very motivated and energised by this time of day. I don’t know what the reason is, but I think it might partly be due to the fact everyone else is winding down but you’re still on a mission and pushing on. I hit Everest at 17 hours and 33 minutes since starting my ride. Super happy with this - but the ride wasn’t over yet.

Darkness was setting in and I had an awesome crew of die-hard sherpas keeping me company. Part of me felt a bit guilty every time I passed them, ignoring them, in my own zone, listening to my most motivational music: Hatebreed, Terror, Sworn Enemy. Adrenaline pushing me onwards deep into the most epic single-day ride I had ever done. For the last 200 reps, I decided I'd split it into two sets of 100. I was one break away from victory. Because of it getting colder, I didn't want to stop much anyway. I was actually shivering while paused now.

"I'll be stopping 20 minutes, guys."
"Okay, we're just going to go to the shops and back!"
They weren't back in 20 minutes. But I actually took this opportunity and ran with it. I did 5 extra reps past my planned 100. Oh? They still weren't back. Perfect! Another 5. Oops... 15 extra! They finally returned and I was now poised with only 85 to go until 1,000. Nothing could have stopped me now. Apart from possibly an angry, sleepless Norwegian (I'm sorry!). There was some on/off light rain, which I found very cooling and also set the scene nicely for the vibes of the Mariana Trench. Although it was now 2am, I was still getting hot whilst climbing, even in just bib shorts and a jersey.

"I saw you on my way to work this morning!"

My friends left me for my final 50 reps. Back to basics, back to how this ride started. Me and the cobbles, in the early hours of the morning. I said hello to the newspaper postman. Hitting the lap button for almost the 1000th time felt exhilarating. I was so close now. Revelling in what I was about to round off. The last 25 reps seemingly felt super hard. My mind felt like it was shutting down. I am never sure if this is just an effect of knowing that the end is coming - would I have felt like this if there was still 250 to go? After doing the 1,000th rep I thought I might as well do 1 more for good luck. 1,001 it was! This total meant I was now comfortably over a 'Trenching' elevation/descent total too - that is, descending and climbing the depth of the Mariana Trench (11,034m / 36,201ft) in one ride on one climb. Wow. Couldn't believe it when I pulled out my phone to stop the ride and saw EXACTLY 23 hours elapsed. Smooth.

I'm super glad that my legs held up. They were still putting out the watts all the way until the end. No idea exactly how many watts as I don't use a power meter, didn't even shave my legs. No cramps, no knee pain. Just a wrecked lower back due to the forces that dude had to endlessly endure. I don't have a sensor for this either but I would be sure that my average cadence for the uphill portions across the entirety of the ride was at or below 60 RPM. Peak masher vibes. Also, kudos to pickle juice for potentially preventively keeping some tense moments at bay.

I've spent about 10 hours today (the day after) trying to recover and combine the corrupted file and good file. It's been an absolute endless rollercoaster. I've been to EVERY website that converts GPS files. I've tried every angle of attack. I even tried blindly hacking the code to make the messed up file readable. After almost completely giving up, I finally cracked it. Don't ask me how - because my brain is absolutely fried - but it had something to do with combining the files, snipping out a tiny bit of the ride where the fateful pause/crash happened and somehow that being enough for the file to fix itself. I am just so happy to have the 'full' version up with the actual barometric elevation data and not having to resort to my phone upload which has a depressingly low and inaccurate total for the vertical gain. That said, the position data for the Wahoo is pretty whacky. Floated out of sync towards the end, but we're in it for the elevation stats, if you want to question my reps, be my guest. I edited the device to say 'Garmin 800' because I think that might have had an impact on it's readability by Strava and also due to the fact that Wahoo does not deserve a 'woohoo' for what they've put me through. I have been told by some that this climb is 13-14 metres, which would equate to another 1,000m or so on top. This is one of the issues of doing repeats on a tiny hill. Even a small deviation can have huge ramifications over the course of a mammoth ride. I am a very chuffed chap though.

Thanks for all the support. Means a lot.

Instagram if you’re into photos of the city and my bike occasionally: http://www.instagram.com/josephxkendrick

YouTube if you want to watch videos of me doing stuff, rarely: http://www.youtube.com/josephxkendrick

Let's see if I can raise £1 for every metre of the Mariana Trench I had to climb out of on cobblestones!

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