Thanks for taking the time to visit The Holiday Inn Express Doncaster  JustGiving page.

Below is the story of one of our team, this is to highlight the pain you suffer as parent/grandparent and why we are doing what we can, to support the 4Louis charity.

Thanks, HIEX Doncaster Team x

Miscarriages, stillbirths, and child loss.

These are the definition of a parent’s worst nightmare. 

How do the parents cope?

How does a woman who once had her belly full, now deal with
her belly empty?

How does a man cope with the empty space in his arms that
was meant to be filled?

Where does the love go that filled their hearts?

When you first find out you’re pregnant you have so many
different emotions. Happiness, elation, nervousness, and a feeling that you can’t quite believe this has happened for you.

As the days go on, each day a new symptom of a human
growing inside you appears. You are forever aware that there is something you created, a miniature you, inside of you, and if by chance you forget, tiredness, cramps or sore boobs will soon remind you. But you don’t mind, in fact the reminder is a happy one.

Then the worst day comes. You are told that one sentence you
will never forget. This comes in many forms, for many different people, always beginning with I’m sorry but…

For me it was I’m sorry, but you will experience a
miscarriage in the next 24 hours.

What comes after this? You go home and await what is the
worst thing you can imagine, whilst praying it not to be true. For some people it’s already happened, and they have the worst feeling of going home with an empty belly, empty arms and a shattered heart.

Those first 24 hours are the worst, how do you tell people?
How do you so easily change your plans that you had for the upcoming Christmas?
What about the clothes you bought? What happens when it is your due date?

Then comes the guilt. Did I do something to make this
happen? Did I get too emotional? Did I put myself in harm’s way? Why didn’t I know something was wrong? Along with the guilt you then get a barrage of emotions that hit you like a truck. Anger, bitterness, devastated, embarrassed, lonely, and incomplete. How can you support the person going through this with you when you’re not strong enough to support yourself? We are both broken.

You then still have the physical reminders which can last up
to 4 weeks. The cramps, sickness, tiredness and sore boobs are still there. But they’re not happy reminders anymore, they’re painful reminders of everything you lost. Then there is an added reminder of the blood, which can last up to 2 weeks after everything you’ve already lost, how can you try to move on when these symptoms torment you?

4Louis supports this ‘after’ process. They bring light to
the loneliness, bitterness and pain. It can never be healed, but they give
support during this time, letting people like me know that we are not alone, all the feelings we have, that feel selfish, aren’t. 

Help us, help parents create memories that will never be lost or forgotten.