Me and my wife are parents to two wonderful little kids. However, both our son Leo, and our daughter Amélie had tough starts to life....

In October 2018, Leo arrived two and a half months early in an unexpected emergency birth. The first time I ever met him, he was hooked up to a ventilator, with all kinds of tubes, monitors and bandages all over him, in a little plastic incubator. He was 2lb 6oz. It wasn't quite the relaxed homebirth we'd been planning! Leo spent a few months in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit at Oldham Royal Hospital. The nurses, doctors and consultants there were, simply, incredible. Without them, our son would not have made it.  This was easily the most stressful and difficult time of our lives at that point. This is when Spoons Charity introduced themselves to offer family support if it was ever needed. They were sensitive to our situation, and offered compassion, and further support if ever needed. 

Fast forward 18 months and our daughter Amélie was born in similar circumstances. Another emergency birth, another incubator and another extended stay in NICU. Luckily, she progressed relatively quickly and there were less complications than with Leo. Unluckily, there was a virus doing the rounds that was to shut down society just as we were discharged with a very tiny baby! 

If we thought we’d had it hard getting by on minimal sleep with Leo, we were in for a shock with Amelie. We’d take it in shifts to hold her and let her sleep on us, whilst desperately trying to keep ourselves awake! We didn’t have any visits to the house. We didn’t have any family, friends, health visitors, nurses, that we’re allowed into the house. There were no bring your own booze parties in the back garden. Amelie didn’t meet her grandparents or any family at home for over 4 months. It was simply, myself, my wife Aimee, little Leo and tiny baby Amelie all in the house together, very much struggling to get by, totally and utterly sleep deprived. It culminated with Aimée having post-natal depression.

Everything she’d been through with Leo, and then with Amelie, not to mention the isolation of lockdown, had taken its toll. And believe me when I say, she is the strongest woman you'd ever meet! To be honest, as a Dad it's easy to feel completely useless, especially in the hospital. But at home, you want to help as much as you can. I couldn't help at all. It was easily the lowest we've ever felt. I think there came a point where we both realised that we needed help. I remembered meeting Kirsten from Spoons at NICU, and those words “if you ever need anything, or any support, just get in touch”. I encouraged Aimee to contact Spoons, which she did, and thankfully she quickly received the support she needed. I cannot put into words just how grateful I was that somebody could talk to her, and help her make sense of it all, where I absolutely couldn’t. They offered expertise, in an efficient and compassionate way, which was absolutely priceless. 

So, if you're still reading this.....well done (you should have seen the first draft!), But this is the part where I'm trying to do something to say thank you and give back to a charity who I owe more than just money to. But, money might help them. So I'm taking part in their Feb50 challenge, where I'll be walking 50 miles in February, and dragging my majorly unfit backside round the hills of Saddleworth in exchange for any spare change you might be able to donate. Thanks so much in advance of any donation you make, on behalf on myself Aimée, and our two miracle premature children, Leo and Amélie. 

OUR COMMITMENTWe are committed to supporting family centred care, improving family facilities, and providing emotional and practical support to parents experiencing neonatal care.WHAT WE DO:Provide parent peer supportSupport parents following discharge from neonatal careRaise awareness of neonatal careRaise funds to improve patient experience and family services on the neonatal unit.