John, due to unfortunate, life circumstances developed depression as a young boy. Through not vocalising his pain and suffering, he sadly turned to drugs for comfort and then developed an addiction - all relatively quickly, but due to drug abuse over a long period of time he then developed and suffered from epileptic seizures.
John fought to recover many times and wished so hard to be free of his demons but sadly they kept going to work and from many attempts to try he sadly lost the battle.
I will share his story as John was never ashamed and would have wanted the truth to be shared and with love in his heart, to try and help others and hopefully inspire other people in an attempt to not follow his path.
He was dry and clean many times and helped a lot of people along his journey. In those moments he achieved a great deal, he had so much to offer. He was a spokesperson and was a sponsor for some time, and through becoming a born again Christian, he was a reader at various churches and would have people laughing, enjoying his deliverance whilst reading out biblical readings in a parody fashion. He was recently, (this year in fact), at college studying to become a counsellor.
Through his life he had relapsed a few times as you maybe aware, fighting an addiction can be an extremely difficult fight to face with temptation looming all around and what life can through at us, at times, but this past year especially, John was fully recovered and had a great year with us all, but due to severe seizures his body suffered from the effects.
He was in critical care last year but by some incredible force, got better and recovered, when all the medics had said he shouldn’t be here due to the severity of his seizure. He had been on a waiting list for rehab for a while and had all the determination in the world after that big scare, then finally got into rehab and got clean and healthy for the past 8 months but sadly had more severe seizures so he struggled a great deal.
We are all devastated beyond belief.
The comfort we have, is that we had our John back for those precious few months, and he had us all by his side supporting him every step of the way.
John had expressed to me, his sister, that he was depressed over the seizures and every time he had one, he felt like he lost a piece of himself. He sounded desperate and I couldn't imagine, how hard it would be to conquer an addiction alone, but to be suffering from hour long seizures, time and time again and being in and out of hospital constantly on top of it, yet still have the drive to get better and want to help others, I feel his strength, willingness, drive, determination and love for helping others, should be shared in his memory.
He actually wrote a week before he passed on our family feed...
‘I think my time is up soon, it’s a real shame, because I was hoping my mess could have been a message to help those that needed it and help make a difference to the world’.
He wanted his story to be shared so to help others and inspire, not to be shamed or judged John wanted to send a message and be of some support to anyone who may need it.
He was loved by many.
We as a family did what we could, and watching someone you love so much suffer so much, and feel so helpless, can also inflict pain and suffering. We will all have to seek some bereavement counselling as we ourselves, are all devastated and feeling the effects of this outcome.
Addiction is closely linked with mental illness and when not taken care of, can effect the individual themselves in more ways, that can become life threatening, but also can effect those around them, so that is why donations will go to the charity MIND.
If John's story has touched you and you would like to help prevent others from following a similar path please donate either by using this online method, or we will be providing a donation box both at the church and the crematorium.
Let's together put a stop to the silence and get people talking!
With love and respect, John's loving family.
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