I am fundraising for Albert Kennedy Trust by attempting to ride 100km over 7 days of cycling, joining up virtually with a socially distant Our Pride Ride with other queer cyclists on June 13th! Whilst this might not sound like a great deal, I am new to cycling and have fibromyalgia. This challenge will mean I will cycle every day in any weather, even if I have a flare. It’s a small target but one I hope I can achieve with your support either financial or moral!

There are no Pride parades this year, and perhaps that is a good thing. It’s a good time to remember that the Stonewall riots were started by transgender people of colour. This is the heart of the message of pride, activism, inclusion and social change. It might be nice if you were going to go to Pride this year to maybe donate that train fare to an LGBTQ+ charity or a Black Lives Matter campaign, or me if you like. I know times are tough but even £1 would be helpful.

I’ve been so lucky during lockdown to be safe and adequately resourced, but I am aware this isn’t the case for many others. During lockdown many young people may be in home environments which are less than supportive of their gender and sexuality, or worse still they may have become recently homeless. The facts are that suicide is much higher amongst LGBTQ+ young people as is self harm and mental health issues. As someone who has experienced a degree of this in my own life, but who has been (just about) resilient enough to support myself, I can tell you how hard life is without feeling safe. 

So why AKT? I was very briefly sofa surfing for a while in 2002 (I was 22) as I didn’t feel I could go home after my church had persuaded me into conversion prayer therapy, then rejected me and I wasn’t out at home. I was terrified that they would out me, or worse still force me into yet more violating exorcisms. It was a very difficult time in my life, I did not feel safe or of any worth. I’m forever grateful to a friend’s sister who let me sleep on the floor in their house share. I also got a job break from Del Hobbs at Sky, enabling me to find a seriously tiny, bleak room in an East Acton flat share. In the weeks before I could move, I had the world’s most bonkers commute. Waking on the floor with no mattress at 4:30am in Blackheath to be out before the others woke. I had most of my possessions in the left luggage at Waterloo. Every evening and weekend I ate in cafes in central London, (mostly chips or cheap jacket potatoes) so as not to inconvenience anyone and spent hours at Internet cafes to get warm, it was a very lonely experience. Eventually I moved myself alone in a cheap taxi from East to West London. I told no one what was really going on because I was deeply ashamed, but eventually it got so much better. I found a flat share that felt like a home in 2003, thank you pals at Sky from that era! I don’t want sympathy for this story, I’m proud of my achievements, I always knew I had to work hard to support myself as there was no safety net at home. However I am grateful I only had to do about two months like that! What I can’t imagine is how some young people manage to do this at length, whilst studying or trying to find homes without a stable income. Nicola can give you more examples where young people have been essentially homeless, sofa surfing or falling through the gaps between the end of care or education, when adult life suddenly starts with no safety net. These young people deserve a break and this is where AKT can help.

AKT and I believe that every LGBTQ+ young person deserves to feel supported, loved and most importantly have a home that is safe. In these tough times everyone needs more kindness, more love, more resources and more safety. Rejection and shame from your family or religion hurts like nothing else, so please if you can spare a few quid know that you are helping a vulnerable young person, like I was once, to overcome the huge challenge of making it on their own. 

I’m telling this story now because it’s time for me to move on, I am now strong enough to attempt to give back, to help others that need some kindness. I have a few friends, my therapist and my patient, forgiving, partner to thank for the fact that I am still upright and feel able to do this at the moment, both mentally and physically. I won’t name names, but to all those checking in on me almost daily on WhatsApp despite your own lockdown struggles, (you know who you are) thank you! I’ve not been ok on a fair few of these long days, for a myriad of reasons, but your love and encouragement has really helped. I can’t wait until we can hug again! I will squeeze you so hard and we will celebrate with chocolate, gin and ice cream! Or maybe gin ice cream coz that’s a thing! 

Thank you for reading this far if you have! Love, kindness and friendship always. LJB 

🏳️‍🌈❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤎🏳️‍🌈

A word from AKT: Lots of young people come out as LGBTQ+ to their families and are embraced and supported. But that’s not always the case. Coming out, or being outed as LGBTQ+ can lead to young people being made homeless. AKT exists to support these young people and can offer safety and hope in an open and accepting environment. We help with housing and also to help them celebrate their identity.