Thank you for donating to Sands Farnborough in memory of baby Rory. This means so much to Yasmin and Morgan Danaher & their families,.
Yasmin & Morgan want to make you aware , in their own words, how Sands and the Rowan Suite, Frimley Park provided support to help them cope with the loss of Rory.
“Our baby Rory was stillborn on the 18th November 2018 at 1.35am at the Frimley Park Hospital Rowan Suite in Surrey.
Rory had a hole in his heart and a narrowing of the aorta that were found at the 20 week scan and further tests revealed that he had multiple chromosome abnormalities that would severely impact his physical health and brain development. What followed was weeks of turmoil as our nightmare slowly became reality and we eventually lost our baby at 24 weeks.
It might only be possible to understand that if you’ve been through an experience like this, the physical pain of delivering your stillborn baby is nothing compared to the anguish and pain you feel in your heart when you know your baby’s heart has stopped beating.
Parental instincts kick in hard and all you want to do is protect your child in anyway you can, do the best for them, and hold on to each short moment you will spend together on this earth. The Sands charity took time to make prints of Rory’s little hands and feet, dress him in tiny baby clothes and provide special teddies and bracelets that both us and Rory could keep forever.
Myself and my husband Morgan spent two nights in the Rowan suite with Rory before we eventually said goodbye and instead of leaving the hospital with a baby in a carrycot, we left with a memory box with his prints, certificates and small keepsakes provided to us by Sands. These little things are all we have of him now and we are so grateful for them!
The Sands charity also funds the bereavement midwife training throughout NHS hospitals in the UK and they were an integral part of the process being made easier for us, from when we were initially given the devastating news, to when we left the hospital. Our bereavement midwives helped us with liaising with the funeral directors, speaking with our families and even dropping some of Rory’s things round to my parents house when we couldn’t face going back to the hospital to collect them.
Our midwives Jo & Monica provided us with a text service so we could text them any questions we needed to and provided a warm and quick response so not to keep us waiting or having to face talking on the phone when we just couldn’t get our words out.
The Sands charity also helps fund birthing suites like the Rowan Suite which are further away from the maternity ward and have double beds, private bathrooms and facilities for the families which meant myself and Morgan could spend time together with Rory before we had to say goodbye and we weren’t next to any other women in labour having ‘take home babies’.
Rory’s presence in our life was short, but it has taught us so much. Not to assume that every new parent gets to bring their beautiful baby home from hospital (as we had assumed), not to take things for granted and not to worry about things in life that don’t really matter.
Rory will always be our first child, our son in the sky, and we will always carry him in our hearts.
As a thank you to the bereavement midwives at the Rowan Suite and the Sands charity as a whole for guiding us through such a difficult time, my lovely godmother Patricia has decided to run the London Marathon this year to raise money for them in hope that we can continue to help other parents going through what we have experienced.
With three to four women a week in the Rowan suite giving birth with the same devastating outcome as our own, and 1 in 4 pregnancies resulting in miscarriage and stillbirth in the UK, its awful to think of the extra heartache families would have to go through if it wasn’t there and women like me had to go through labour on the main maternity ward!
Thanks Patricia!!! Lots of Love,
Yasmin & Morgan X”
Farnborough Sands Services.
Your kind fundraising will help Sands continue to provide free bereavement support services to families, including Family Support packs and memory boxes to families in Farnborough and across the UK. Donations will contribute towards the running costs of Farnborough Sands including local support meetings and helpline. All these local services are fully backed up by our Sands helpline, and other dedicated support services offering a lifeline to anyone when a baby dies.
Farnborough Sands have provided grants to the Rowan Suite, Frimley Park hospital.
The money you contribute will help to maintain and expand our extensive bereavement care training programme for health professionals across the UK including those within Farnborough. You will be helping to make sure every parent whose baby has died receives equally excellent bereavement care wherever they are in the UK.
Research is also an incredibly important part of our work and your donations will also be helping to fund research to better understand what causes baby deaths and save babies’ lives to ultimately ensure every parent gets to see their baby grow up
Thank you for your donation