I am running the 2023 London Marathon in Support of Stonewall, Europe’s largest LGBTQ+ (lesbian, gay, bi, trans, queer, questioning and ace) rights organisation. As a gay man, I know how much this charity impacts my life. I want to support our LGBTQ+ communities by sharing my story.

I was born, raised, and spent most of my adulthood in the beautiful city of Szczecin in northwest Poland. I have a lot of love for my hometown, but it did not always feel like a safe place to be open about my sexuality. Some of my friends came out early in their lives and had the support of their families, but there were also stories of children being disowned upon coming out. My winding journey took ten years, when finally at the age of 30 I felt comfortable enough to sit down with my mum and share “the news” that I would invite a son-in-law to the family someday.

I had come out to a few friends in my 20s, which allowed me to build a safe and friendly space where I could be myself. As grateful as I was for this shelter, it wasn’t easy only being at ease under certain circumstances and feeling the need to compartmentalise my life. I felt like I needed to be someone else for the rest of the time.

Life constantly reminded me of this tension. Sometimes it was subtle, like in the case of my family’s expectations. Sometimes it was open, like the negative rhetoric from the religion I was raised in or the humiliating jokes where gay people were often the punchline.

The result was low self-esteem and a lack of being assertive. I used to struggle to stand up for myself. I felt ashamed, weak, and worthless. I was convinced that I deserved to feel like this.

One of my coping mechanisms was using (over)working as a form of escape. I stayed at work late, or I took on many side-projects. There was a moment when the deadline of one of my additional work projects clashed with a friend's event. Instead of enjoying the weekend with them, I apologised and simply worked more. At that point, someone asked me what I was running from.

Today I know I was running away from myself. After many years, I was finally convinced I was worth fighting for. I decided to go to therapy to better understand myself. I realised I could get support from others only if I were honest with them. Today, I am sure I deserve to love, be happy, and feel safe.

I moved to the United Kingdom in 2019. The difference in the liberty of LGBTQ+ communities between Poland and the UK is undeniable. Knowing that my sexual identity was now protected explicitly by law – hate crime laws, for example – gave me a lot of comfort. 

These laws are a tremendous support to LGBTQ+ communities, among others. As a gay man, it made a huge difference to me, and I know it does for millions around the country. Everyone should have equal access to living their authentic self and opportunities for happiness. I am a firm believer that this should be protected.

This is why I am running the London Marathon in support of Stonewall. Founded by Sir Ian McKellen, Lord Michael Cashman, Lisa Power and other trailblazers, Stonewall has led fights on behalf of LGBTQ+ rights since 1989. Their many UK successes include an equal age of consent for gay and bi men; the end of Section 28 in Scotland, England and Wales; and the right for same-sex couples to get married. More recently, their efforts have focused on getting LGBTQ-inclusive teaching in the national curriculum and helping evacuate LGBTQ+ refugees from Afghanistan.

Organisations like Stonewall help move the needle, supporting every one of us to embrace our true selves. I follow Stonewall's reports on the fight for trans rights. I see our community's great strength in diversity, mutual respect, and care for each other. Another topic close to my heart is banning conversion therapy in the UK. These are only some of the many issues that Stonewall is helping to work through, thereby improving the lives of millions of LGBTQ+ people.

I’m happy I could share this story with you. I see it as a part of a long journey towards finding myself. I consider myself fortunate to have had the support I’ve had throughout my life, despite rarely being able to ask for it – but this time, I’m asking openly. Every word of support and donation will motivate me during the marathon, so please consider donating and sharing this story with your own networks.

So here I am, no longer running from myself, but running for myself.

Thank you so much for reading, and I’ll see you at the finish line!