It all began in 2014 after the birth of my beautiful little girl Maisie. She was 18 weeks old when I was given my life changing diagnosis, it’s hard to describe the emotions that run through you when not only are you trying to adapt to first time motherhood but also all the hormones, sleep deprivation and lack of control over everything that go hand in hand with the first few months of a new born baby’s life.

Approximately one month later, in an absolute whirlwind, my treatment began. 4 lots of chemo followed by a scan highlighted that some of it had disappeared but unfortunately along with the positive feeling that it had partly worked, there were also new spots that were showing which meant that the treatment simply wasn’t strong or effective enough. The next step involved further treatment until it was deemed that I was at the lowest risk possible to allow me the best outcome for my stem cell transplant. 

After an agonizing wait and a follow up scan, I had the devastating news that the transplant hadn’t worked after 6 months of being in remission.  Retrospectively, I was feeling quite hopeless at this point in my mindset and therefore this then prompted me to seek a second opinion from a consultant in London. After much discussion, he also came to the same conclusion as my primary consultant and therefore another plan needed to be made to continue my treatment into 2016.

Chemotherapy was then continued and I was told that my best chance of being able to fight and be completely cancer free would be to consider another stem cell transplant but this time from a matching donor. This took a significant amount of time as a perfect match needed to be found, contacted, tested, agree to participate (as it can take some time to collect enough stem cells of the right quality and quantity) and then have them implanted. 

Unfortunately, 3 of my matching donors failed on medical terms at the last stage of testing. They then found one matching donor and I was all set, went for my pre-consultation scan and was completely devastated that the cancer had come back again. There was too much cancer to proceed with the transplant and so I had no other options at this point other than to consider clinical trials.

I filled in all my paperwork and was accepted onto a trial that was running up in Manchester. There should have been 6 separate cycles of treatment with two-week gaps in between. I completed 3 of these but my consultant felt that he had withdraw me as it was aggravating my already diagnosed colitis and IBS due to having to take such high doses of steroids and any long-term effects this may have on me with it being a trial drug.

Due to so many unsuccessful donor attempts, the hospital wanted to ensure that the donor that best matched myself wasn’t lost. As a precautionary measure, they froze the donors stem cells and although not ideal as they were not fresh they were implanted (as they were frozen it meant that my recovery was much longer).

I stayed in hospital until I was no longer neutropenicand was allowed to go home as long as I promised to attend the hospital appointments once a week. At this point in time I had to be housebound due to all infection risks, which as you can imagine is incredibly difficult to manage at the best of times let alone with a small child at nursery. Although it was lovely to finally be home, it was the start of a very slow recovery – I was thoroughly exhausted and needed 24 hour care. My 31 year old body had the immune system of a new born baby and was susceptible to catching anything.

100 days later a scan confirmed my life shattering news. I was given between 4 weeks to under a year to live – nothing can ever prepare you for this. I had to tell all my family, friends but most importantly my precious little girl. This by far is the hardest thing I have ever had to do, words cannot even begin to describe it.

After 4 years of absolute hell and torture, every treatment failing, I was at an all time low. I felt that I had nothing to lose and therefore decided to research alternative treatment options and subsequent complementary therapies. I sought further information and support from friends, family and the online community and this led me to embark on a strict diet regime working in parallel with a cosmodic machine. At the time I was unsure it was having a physical effect on me however, it was making me feel mentally more positive, physically more energized and overall reducing my pain and tiredness.

I maintained my healthy alkaline diet for 3 months to expel all of the chemotherapy out my system and continued to use my cosmodic machine, which helped the recovery and repair of my cells a lot more quickly. 

At the time I started to feel a lot better and had read and heard about patients who had opted to use cannabis oil as an alternative treatment. I researched this further to understand the clear distinction between CBD and THC, Rick Simpson helped me understand the dosage and protocol required as I decided to pursue this.

Fast forward to February 2018 (less than 6 months after embarking upon my alternative treatments) I became unwell and was hospitalized. Reluctantly, I had to have a scan to find out what antibiotics were required to make me better. My consultant then came to see me unexpectedly to report the results from the scan and confirmed that there was NOHodgkin’s Lymphoma. Sat on my own in hospital, to my absolute delight and amazement I planned my escape route (not really). I was in disbelief, complete and utter shock and didn’t know what and how to say to tell people, I had convinced myself that people would think I was making the whole thing up.

Now in the midst of summer, I’ve had a wonderful family holiday, something I never thought I would be able to do and I am enjoying spending time with those who matter. I’m back to being a mummy rushed off her feet again, taking every day as it comes and appreciating all the time that I didn’t think I would have.

I certainly appreciate all the little things; my priorities have certainly changed and I can’t wait to see how everything continues to unfold. I am in the process of putting pen to paper about my journey! Watch this space!

Any money received will be donated to Bloodwise. I thank you in advance for any donations made.