My Dad, my beautifully kind, loyal, funny Dad.

On April 22nd 2021, I gave birth to my beautiful Daughter Aoife, and following the best day of my life, came the worst day, I unexpectedly lost my Dad, Graham, in the middle of the night not too long after 12am on the 23rd of April. I experienced so much pain and trauma in such a short period of time and I have been forever changed as a result.

Dad is loved and missed by many, I am not the only one who suffers, being 1 of 5 of his children, I do not carry this pain alone.

My Dad struggled severely with his Mental Health, he was mine and I was his best friend for many a year. We got each other through many years of hard ship and pulled each other through very dark times. It is bitter sweet that my Dad was taken from me when he finally wanted to live. He was so excited to be a Grandad and there was so much life he had left in him. There will never be enough words to describe him and the love he had. My daughter now knows he is in heaven, and that he lives in the moon and the stars.

Over the past 4 years I have been relearning and finding myself again, learning that it’s ok that I won’t be the same Millie as before. That I am allowed to be different now and that I don’t owe anyone anything. I have and continue to, go through dark moments of wishing I could see Dad much sooner, but I have always turned to physical movement and talking to pull myself out of that. There are dark times ahead, that I am sure of, but there is also light.

Across the years I have and still do, deeply struggle with my Grief, I cannot put it into words the loss of my Dad and the impact of losing him. He was and still is, my bestfriend, who I could count on in any lifetime.

Sue Ryder is not ‘just’ a hospice, it also supports those with their grief, not just in person but also online, and this is how I found them. I used their online resources to help me find ways to manage and live with my grief, not forget it, but to live with it. They helped me realise that my grief is ok, and that I need to create a safe space for it to live alongside me and in me. That grief doesn’t define me, but it is now apart of me.

So I am going to put myself through months of training, to prepare myself for the biggest run of my life so far, the London Marathon 2026. Race day is only 3 days after the anniversary of my Dad dying, so it will be truly fitting to dedicate my run to him.

Running, in memory of my Dad, but to support this charity that does so much more beneath the surface than anyone might think.

Before I start this, I’d like to thank anyone who has never given up on me, never judged me for my mental state. I thank those who encourage me to talk about Dad, who sit with me in my tears and who sit with me in my joy. I hope you know how much I love you all, and how much love I have to give.

I hope you enjoy watching my journey, the mental battles to come, the physical challenges and at last, crossing the finish line on 26th of April 2026.