It's almost time for the kids to go back to school...

And just like that, it is the middle of August and the kids are beginning to think about going back to school again as September fast approaches.

For some it is going to be their first day ever of school and the beginning of a journey that they will undoubtedly never forget. For others, it is their last first day of their final year in school; feelings of hope of going out into the real world as ‘grown-ups’. Here’s to hoping they aren’t coming into this world with a feeling they wish they hadn’t grown up so quickly, but rather, with an optimistic feeling of endless possibilities that lie ahead of them.

Going back to school was never fun for me - I really did not like it.

For loads of different reasons, some of which I have discussed in earlier posts and some I am sharing for the first time.

The main reason I hated school was because I never felt smart enough. I was often left feeling like the dumb kid in the class. School was just hard.

Also, I often felt bullied. You know how it goes, kids can be so cruel. Bullied for different reasons, one used to because of my uniform. My trousers never quite fit me. I was walking around looking like Michael Jackson with my socks on display, except mine weren’t covered in diamonds but instead with funky cartoons and colours. I had a school jumper where I had coloured in the logo with a permanent ink one day after school that just never washed off.

Trousers that fit and a fresh jumper just wasn’t something that was meant for me. I never asked why, but I assume it was because we just didn’t have the money for it. Quite honestly, I never thought to ask why, but instead, I used to have a feeling of, ‘why are my classmates picking on me?’ Always feeling lost and confused rather than with a thought of, ‘I haven’t got the thing and so they’re picking on me’.

Home wasn’t always the safest place and so you’d think that I would love school; it should have been an escape from it all. But for me it wasn’t. Instead, it served as a place of anxiety and constant worry about my mum. Hoping that she would be ok at home. I had a thing where I would never let her go. I was so scared of being left alone at school and I was so scared of what might happen to her at home. Hence why my focus was never there at school.

When I was in playgroup, for the first few months, I would never let my mum leave. Until one day she and the playgroup teachers worked out how to trick me. The teachers would tell me my mum had gone to the toilet and would be right back - she hadn’t, she had gone home.

In year two, every morning, we ran the same movie scene day after day. On the playground waiting for the bell to ring with my mum and when it did, I would grip her tight and cry for her to take me home and to not leave me at school. I had to stay at school.

All this to say - school was a hard time for me.

Am I happy that I came out the other end and that my mum did, too? Hell yeah! Lessons learned, character built and all that jazz.

But do I wish it could have been different? Easier, happier and just more comfortable? Hell to the fucking yeah.

I didn’t have that for myself but with your help, we can help to create it for someone else.

So today I am thinking about what I can do to make the experience better for someone else who may be going through similar pains as me or just pain in general as it relates to school experiences.

And I have come up with some ideas, which I hope to execute at the end of this month - precisely on Tuesday, 26 August. I am putting together a Back-to-school afternoon event for the kids in the My Yard community.

Who is My Yard? My Yard started as a community response to local food poverty & social deprivation in the Harrow, Bushey and Barnet areas. It began as a vehicle to share surplus food but has organically grown into an empowered, inclusive community represented by residents of all ages and backgrounds who look out for each other, problem solve and celebrate. The charity works with those living in temporary accommodation who cannot work, live on low incomes, and who struggle to feed their families.

So far we have North West London’s finest: the Homegrown barbershop crew coming down to do some cuts for the kids; to have them looking and feeling fresh for their return to the playground.

We have a very generous donation of snacks and sweets from a friend who is a wholesaler specialising in American confectionery, donating a pallet of treats for the kids to fill their lunch boxes with.

There is also a group of my close friends who I can rely on to contribute funds to help build a pot of cash to buy things for the kids for their return to school.

The shopping list includes school supplies for the kids including pencil cases and sharpeners, pens and pencils and rubbers to fill them with. Along with school uniforms; shirts, t-shirts, skirts and trousers.

What would we really love from you? A donation, a contribution to enhance what we can put together for the kids. Whether it is a monetary donation, a gift of your time, clothes or stationary - please don’t be shy.

Let’s help create a positive experience for as many kids as possible on back to school week this September.