Our Story 🤍✨

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this page. It's taken a lot for me to actually sit and write this, because the memories of everything that happened are very raw still and make my heart ache to think about them. I know we are the lucky ones because our Lola is here, alive, healthy and growing everyday but it doesn't make remembering Lola's first year any easier.

On 13th February, our beautiful youngest daughter Lola was born. She was perfect, all 8lbs 1oz of her 🤍 all of her newborn checks were absolutely fine, and we couldn't wait to bring her home to introduce her to her big sister. Once we got home to Edie, we knew our family felt complete. How lucky we were to have two beautiful girls to love forever. 🩷

Over the next few days, we noticed Lola's colouring had changed and we had her jaundice diagnosis confirmed. Lola in herself was absolutely fine, and showed no "typical" symptoms of being seriously unwell but something to me didn't feel right. My heart knew Lola was very poorly and my worst fear was confirmed when we received a phonecall in the middle of the night to say her blood test results had come back and we needed to go in immediately for emergency care for Lola.

The details of the next few weeks are very raw for me and I don't ever talk about it let alone write them down so please bear with me! I would never wish Lola's first few weeks of life on any family. Not being able to have my baby in my arms when she was crying out for me for hours (which then turned into days on end) as she was placed in a baby cot for phototherapy treatment, my baby not being able to see me for wearing a mask on her eyes to shield her from the phototherapy lights, being separated from my biggest baby at home in a time where change meant she needed me just as much, to having to leave my littlest baby in hospital for two nights and not be with her when she was only 10 days old... Feeling like I was having to decide between my two babies who couldn't be in the same place, one not even able to be in my arms, is a heartbreak I hope I never ever experience again. Making decisions we didn't really know anything about because Lola's situation was critical. Having conversations with nurses, doctors, consultants and being told Lola's test results showed she was just under the measurement for brain damage. Lola received a blood transfusion at 10 days old which saved her life and is the reason she's here today. I donate blood every 16 weeks (as often as women can) in the hopes I too can save a little Lola. The person who donated their time and of course their blood will always have an incredibly special place in our hearts as a family for saving our daughter's life 🤍

Lola's first year consisted of constant monitoring at the hospital, SO many blood tests I lost count and so many appointments I lost count of those too. Lola was tested for genetic blood disorders which would take months to come back. These genetic blood disorders ranged from able to live with but needing treatments such as regular blood transfusions, to more serious conditions which meant Lola would be in and out of hospital regularly, could potentially need surgeries, and of course as a mum you Google and research - some were life limiting, some meant she would only live to a certain age. At every single appointment, with every single nurse, doctor and consultant, we were told they predicted 99.9% that Lola had one of these health conditions. I think there were 80+ they tested for. The months and months of blood tests, monitoring, the not knowing but the experts in the fields telling us not to get our hopes up that Lola would receive the all clear sent my anxiety through the roof. As an already anxious person, I can't tell you how exhausted mentally I was this first year, not just from having the girls so close together. I held onto hope at every appointment, and always asked if there was hope Lola would receive the all clear. I always received the same answer, but my hope always remained. What if our little Lola would go against all odds and actually be ok? ✨

Just under a year on from when Lola was born, we received the INCREDIBLE news that Lola was absolutely HEALTHY and had none of the 80+ health conditions she was tested for. NONE! Our little Lola had defeated all the odds. I can't explain the feeling of hearing this news and even as I write this now my heart races a little bit remembering how I felt like I could pass out. I remember hugging my babies so tight and wishing so hard we'd never go through something like this again 🤍

And now to the Half Marathon... To anyone that knows me, my god I am NOT a runner. I've got into running this year and have actually dare I say it, enjoyed it! But the furthest I've ran is 10k. This is double that and then some!

I'm running to raise as much money as possible for the absolutely incredible Southampton NICU team through Southampton Hospitals Charity, where Lola received her life saving blood transfusion at 10 days old and received her hospital treatment. Without the midwives, nurses, care assistants, doctors, consultants and every single person that pours their hearts into their work there, our little Lola wouldn't be here today. The money I raise will go towards saving other little Lola's of the world, and giving them a chance to LIVE 🤍✨

I know I'll find this challenge tough, but I'll keep reminding myself - nothing will feel as hard as that first year for Lola, so I'll keep running for my babies 🤍✨

P.s - The photos of Lola's time in hospital are very hard to look at for me, let alone share online. I still to this day find it really hard to look at them. This photo on here is of Lola after her blood transfusion when she was finally out of phototherapy light treatment and back in my arms after days of treatment. Every time I look at this photo, I remember the feeling of her back in my arms and feeling whole again 🤍