On the 4th July I went into the Women’s hospital with some reduced foetal movements. I honestly thought it would all be fine. I thought she had probably just turned around and was hiding. I was so convinced it would ok I hadn’t even given Junio the option of coming with me. I’d left him behind doing DIY in the house, telling him that I’ll just go and quickly get checked over.

After the student midwife, the midwife, and then the sister couldn’t find her heart beat using a doppler, I was taken through to have an ultrasound. It didn’t take long for the obstetric registrar to turn around and tell me that unfortunately there was no heartbeat, and that our little girl had sadly passed away.

Clara was stillborn at 04:17am on 7th July at the Women’s Hospital.

She came out looking so perfect. Both me and Junio were so taken aback at how beautiful she was. We held her in our arms and were able to be with her for the whole day. We’ve since been back several times to see her, and this Wednesday 23rd July she will be buried next to our friend’s little boy Reggie.

This has been the hardest thing that we’ve ever had to go through, but we both firmly believe that Clara is now in Heaven. We believe that she is safe in paradise, and that because of God's grace we will be reunited with her again one day. We both take so much comfort in this, and that she has not had to suffer the injustice and sins of this world.

Throughout this process the Honeysuckle team at the Women’s have been fantastic. They’ve walked with us through this journey, helping to explain things like the options for postmortem, funeral arrangements etc, they provided a room where we could be with Clara on our own, and could keep coming back to, they provided a beautiful memorial garden that we can use to sit and reflect. They provide ongoing support with signposting counselling, and will help to liaise with the next stage of the process when we get our postmortem results back.

We would never want anyone else to go through what we have, but we know that if they do the Honeysuckle team will be there to support them like they have us.

We would love it if you chose to donate to this charity, to help with their work in supporting those experiencing a similar situation to ours.