I am running the Richmond Marathon for EoLDUK and in memory of Stephen Lark.

The day before my 25th birthday, after a long battle with oesophageal cancer, we lost a dear family friend, Stephen. Stephen showed courage until his final days, and anyone who knew him will understand what a unique soul he truly was. Dry and intelligent, Stephen always had a witty retort or (often mathematical) solution to your problems. He embraced us like family, remembering every birthday and milestone as we grew up, talking to us about history, and humouring every tie my mum bought him—including the utterly tacky light up, singing Christmas monstrosity he donned with pride. Stephen was much more than I can write here, much more than anecdotes—umbrellas and caramel iced macchiatos— and he is worth more than any amount of miles I can run.

With that being said, you might be asking why I’d bother running a marathon. I have always found myself asking the same question: “Who on earth would want to go that bloody far?”

Anyone that knows me, knows that running has never come naturally to me. A chronic asthmatic and now ex-smoker, my lungs just aren’t built for it. At least, that’s what I’d tell myself. Until I took myself for a run in Torquay a few days after Stephen’s passing. It felt like another form of meditation; outside of writing, it seemed to be the only time I was truly alone with the world, and with my body. I’m still not a runner, but I want to push myself to go further than ever before, in Stephen’s memory and to fundraise for a charity which supported him, and many others who require end of life care.

So, I’m running my first full marathon, the Richmond marathon (London) in September for End of Life Doulas UK.

The role of an end of life doula:

“An end of life doula is a compassionate, trained companion who supports individuals with a terminal diagnosis and those important to them. Offering support at any age or stage of illness, [a doula’s] non-medical role is to preserve the quality of wellbeing, sense of identity and self-worth from the moment [they] are called upon. By providing emotional, practical, and spiritual support, an end of life doula acts as a consistent and flexible presence with knowledge, experience and understanding, to facilitate an end of life that it is as peaceful, meaningful and dignified as it can be.”

https://eol-doula.uk/what-is-an-end-of-life-doula/

About End of Life Doulas UK (EoLDUK):

“At End of Life Doula UK, we are dedicated to ensuring that every individual receives compassionate, person-centred, holistic support at the end of life. We understand that dying, death, and bereavement are profound experiences, not only for the person at the end of life but also for those important to them. Our role is to guide, accompany, and assist individuals, along with their family and friends, during this journey, offering a combination of emotional, practical, and spiritual support tailored to the person’s wishes. We also aim to support death literacy and competency development by providing spaces and opportunities within our communities for people to build their knowledge and confidence around death and dying to enable them to care for their own.”

https://eol-doula.uk/about-end-of-life-doula-uk/

As well as the amazing support they offer individuals coming to terms with a terminal prognosis, EoLDUK offers funding for compassionate individuals to train as doulas—including my wonderful mum.

Please know that I, and EoLDUK, appreciate any donation you might be able to spare to help extend and amplify support for end of life care. I hope any money raised can help individuals have a “good life to the very end”, rather than just a “good death” (Atul Gawande,  Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End).