I am fundraising for SANDS, a charity that supported our family in ways I can never fully put into words. In May, I will be doing the Leap of Love skydive in honour of our son, Jaxon, and to help fund the vital work SANDS do for families facing the unimaginable.

On 7th December 2025, we lost our beautiful son, Jaxon. He was born sleeping. He stole our hearts from the moment we knew he existed, from the first time I felt him move, from imagining the tiny person he would become & yet, the moment we finally met him we had to let him go. The weight of that love, the hope and dreams we had for him, became heavier than anything I’ve ever carried. At 20 years old, I never imagined I would be planning a funeral instead of imagining a future with my baby. I should have been counting down the days until we brought him home, dreaming about sleepless nights, first steps, and the trouble he and his sister would have caused. Instead I had to say goodbye.

Holding Jaxon for the first time was the most heartbreaking and beautiful moment of my life. Every inch of him, every tiny detail of his perfect little face, is etched into my memory. I whispered I love you over and over, trying to make him feel warmth, safety, and love, even though nothing could change what had happened. Loving him didn’t stop when I had to let him go, it became something I carry every second of every day, a mix of pain and love that is impossible to put into words.

Grief after losing a baby isn’t always visible. Sometimes it’s the questions you face: “Is he born yet?” “Where the bump gone” “I bet your so excited” Every time someone asks, you relive the heartbreak, explain it again and again, or choose to stay silent because it’s too much to carry. Sometimes grief looks like laughing louder than anyone else in the room, smiling while your chest feels like it’s being crushed & showing up for life even when it feels unbearable.

Since losing Jaxon, the world has felt sharper, heavier & quieter all at the same time. Every noise, every moment, hits differently. There’s a silence where his cries should have been, a stillness where his little movements should have been. And yet in the love I have for my daughter, for Blake & for our family, I find small pieces of my heart being stitched back together. But the ache for Jaxon never fades.

This skydive is terrifying, but nothing will ever feel as terrifying as laying my body down to give birth to a baby I knew would never take a breath, who would never come home with us. Taking part in the Leap of Love is my way to honour him and support SANDS so they can continue helping families who are living through the unimaginable. My goal is to raise £500 and every donation will go directly to helping parents navigate heartbreak no one should have to endure alone.

Please help us honour Jaxon, keep his memory alive & support SANDS so they can continue giving care, comfort & guidance to families when the world feels unbearably cruel. Every single donation no matter how small, and even sharing this page, makes a real difference.

Jaxon existed. He mattered. And loving him didn’t end when I had to say goodbye.

With love,

Jade, Blake, Alaia, and Jaxon ♥️