My Daughter Gaia was born on November 3rd 2023.

My Daughter Gaia died on November 5th 2023.

After an uncomplicated and very low risk birth - Gaia was unable to start breathing by herself. She was taken to resus and by the time the medical team managed to stabilise her, oxygen-deprived brain damage had occurred, forcing our baby onto life support, with very reduced brain activity.

After two days of hoping and waiting, we had to make the decision that no parent should have to make, ever: to give up the fight to save her from at best, a life of pain, misery, and struggle.

Gaia’s death largely still remains a mystery and we will continue to look for answers this year. The purpose of this page is to not talk about the how's, why's and circumstances of her death but to talk about the great work that the charity Held in Our Hearts do, it is work that may go overlooked by some, but is a lifeline for those who find themselves experiencing the devastating trauma of losing their baby.

In the whirlwind two days Gaia was alive, the charity Held in our Hearts, supported us to make memories with Gaia. Together we created a Memory Box, it contains canvases of her tiny footprints, locks of her hair and photographs that we will cherish forever. All of these little touches mean so much to us from the short life she had, they are all things we would never have thought of creating within the madness of the headspace that you’re put under during the most terrible of situations.

Every day, before I start work, I face a mini easel which has a small canvas of Gaia’s footprints and her name, it’s a reminder every day, to give my all going forward in everything I do.

As well as memory making, Held in Our Hearts provides counselling through a peer support network of other parents who have lost children. Whilst NHS counselling services have been offered to us, nothing can replace the empathy of a parent who has experienced the heavy trauma we have. The charity offer training to those peer support mentors to ensure they themselves are equipped to coach grieving families, teaching coping mechanisms to get us back to work and to find joy in a baby-less world.

However, the charity relies on voluntary donations to make all of this support a possibility for the people who need it most. A donation to this charity helps not only create precious memories but rehabilitate parents who could be in a dark place. To show your support in Gaia’s memory and to ensure Held in Our Hearts can continue their hugely important work, please consider making a donation.

A donation of £10 means: A series of photo cards capturing precious memories for families

A donation of £30 means: A hospital bag can be given to parents

A donation of £50 means: A specialist counselling session for bereaved parents

A donation of £100 means: Creation of a memory box, counselling for parents and a real effort in helping the charity continue to do their work

A total of £7500 means every single family in Scotland for an entire year could receive a memory box. A monumental milestone.

I've never been someone who's super fit, but I'm dedicating the whole of 2024 to sobriety, veganism and leading a spartan life to not only be the best I can for this upcoming marathon but the other athletic pursuits I need to complete this year; boxing, mountain climbs, a triathlon, camping the west highland way, cycling from East to West Scotland trying my hand at pro wrestling and to keep Gaia’s memory alive in the form of these and me sane in the process.

A sponsor today, isn't necessarily just for running this Edinburgh half marathon, but to keep giving me a reason to continue down this journey and to keep me accountable.

I will move as much as I can because Gaia was never given the chance to. This is a gift we all take for granted and something I would encourage anyone to do as a form of trauma processing.