Hello, my name is Ross and a little bit about me in 1999 I had my very first panic attack I was 15 year old and thought I was about to die! I was playing football with friends when the ball hit a telephone wire the ones that are outside from pole to house.

I kicked the ball to the wire and caught the ball suddenly felt numb and my mind telling me something was wrong. I ran home so fast in hysteris my mum confused and calmed me down. As a child I guess I didn't think much off it.

However this would be the start of my mental health issues it would seem. People on the outside may laugh and think what an idiot, but it was very much real to me the feeling I was about to die and suddenly these feelings I have never had rushing through my body.

I am now 40 years of age and all through my teens to my late 20s was a very dark place with mental health from not being able to leave the house in fear of dying to making myself sick when eating incase I was choking! I refused to believe in the word mental health because in a strange way it wasn't even a thing back then not like it is today. I just had to live in a way to make myself feel safe each day and in a result I was not actually living at all I was just going day to day listing to these inner feelings that I became to belive in!

I could probably go in to details on how my anxiety / panic disorder really did take control of my life, but that's not my story my story is here and now!

At the age of 28 I got my first job in a charity shop to help me get out and about on my own, I remember one day I ran out of the work place to run home as I was having a panic attack.

That feels like it's in the past now as I didn't give up I kept on fighting my demons yes I had support from people around me, but trust me when I say this if you want something to change only you have the power to do this.

I have always been in to inline skating and in away it saved me it helped me to get out it pushed me to believe that if I set myself a goal I can achieve it, from just tiny steps to bigger achievements.

I have been inline skating for around 25 years and met so many people it's taught me to actually open up to people not to hide away in fact I no longer hide my mental state and look at it as you might look at the weather it maybe raining outside, but it won't stop me going out I'll just use an umbrella!

Don't get me wrong I really do still have my own mental health issues or state of mind however you want to describe it, I just now understand my feelings more and have learnt to sit with my anxiety look around and realise it's my own anxiety /panic disorder that's holding me back then I push through and if you had told me this back then I would had not believed you at all.

Moving forward I am now a store manager in retail (that's right I went from charity shop worker running home to running a store with many different people.) I am always open to talking to people about mental health and not wanting people to ever go down the path I had been down with these demons.

I remember seeing a work colleague having a panic attack and felt I was in the right place at the right time. To pass on my wisdom.

Now I want to raise as much money as possible by doing the Berlin marathon 20th September on inline skates.

This sets my anxiety high from flying out to being on my own for the 26 miles on skates. So I thought if I'm going to do something I really want to do why not do it with a purpose and come full circle with everything that's happened in my life, something to look back on and feel proud that everything happened for a reason.

I will leave you with this.

What if everyone has a secret, but it's the same secret....