In March 2021, I got the news that doctors had found a tumour in my mum’s brain. I had a pretty hazy end to high school, followed by a summer spent caring for her at home. We fed her her favourite fruits and banchan, to porridge, and eventually through a syringe when that privilege got taken away from us. I managed to convince myself and my family that I was holding up fine. I spent my days reading up on mortality rates, miracle stories and alternative treatments unavailable in Korea; still, most of the time, I scrolled myself away with whatever I could find.

When I secured my offer on results day, I let myself cry in front of her for the first time since. She brought herself to open her eyes to meet mine, and I appreciated her for lending me as much time as I needed. That would be the last time she did so - I kind of knew in the moment. I soon found myself unpacking my cardboard boxes, trying my best to fill up my room as I readied myself for freshers. It didn’t take a genius to figure why my dad rang not long after; and so began uni, with a celebration of her life in my dorm room.

The last 4 years took a good amount of mental & physical self-abuse, consistent failure and guilt - but more importantly, loved ones and time (&& therapy + meds lol big up Ellen & sertraline) for me to obtain the courage and headspace to truly honour this whole thing through action. I hope I can leave some positive impact by sharing this publicly instead of thinking away, writing in the notes app, or, in the earlier days, dumping it onto whoever willing to listen (to an unsustainable amount).

That’s where I’m at now. if you’ve read this far, I want to shamelessly ask you to donate the smallest amount you feel comfortable. All proceeds will go to Brain Tumour Research UK, it would mean the world for me && some good old positive karma for you!!!