Thanks for taking the time to visit my JustGiving page. Please Note - I am NO LONGER ABLE TO RUN THE MARATHON THIS YEAR. INJURY to my leg, from foot through to hip and thigh, now makes this impossible. This has been caused by the way I run to compensate for the chronic arthritis I have in my foot joints, which has put out the line of my ankle, knee and hip, affecting my lower back too.  I have had to stop running completely and take up a series of daily exercise instead to re-align my leg.  Regular physio and a visit to a specialist are now in place, although I have been told it could take a minimum of four months to heal the injuries sustained. I'm so disappointed and frustrated not to be able to fulfil this pledge for the RLSB - THIS year - but have deferred to run next year. To those of you who have been kind enough to donate already; please know that your funds will be held and put forward to the charity for my run next year. This time I will have corrective footwear and begin my training in early autumn so that I can build the muscle strength slowly and with a longer lead into the big race.  So sorry to let everyone down,  

Tana

I have foolishly/courageously (your choice!) decided to run the London Marathon in just 17 week's time! At the time of accepting this challenge, I genuinely could not run more than 100 metres without having to stop and walk. So why would this resident couch potato - who is several stones overweight and has chronic and painful arthritis in both feet do such a ridiculously demanding challenge? Because I care.  I care passionately about the children of our nation. I care deeply about the struggles that so many of our young people battle with in the face of all the challenges they meet in their young lives. I care enough to try to do what I can to make a difference to their lives and to change perceptions and understanding. In this regard, I am talking most particularly about their mental health, understanding now as I do, exactly how every trial faced in their young lives can impact so massively on their teenage years and their adulthood.

Why do I care so passionately about them, and their mental health ?...(and yes you are allowed to question why I am running for the Royal London Society for the Blind - when I'm talking about mental health.....I'm coming to that so please, please keep reading - there is an important link!).  Because I have taught 11-18 yr olds for twenty-five years: I have run a boarding house for sixty 13-18 yr olds for 12 years, living with that number of girls as part of our family....and as a result I have lived too with all their mental health problems; their anxiety, depression; eating disorders; self-harm; lack of self-esteem; fears, loneliness and regrettably their suicide...enhanced so often by their inability to ask for help because they have no idea to whom they can truly turn for support.  I could go on.

I also have my own experiences that have provided the opportunity for the most extraordinary learning. I have had the privilege of struggling with my own mental health issues which resulted in an un-anticipated six month stay in a psychiatric hospital as I battled with deep depression and Post Traumatic Stress Anxiety/Disorder.  You might be surprised at my use of the word privilege. That six month battle and the following 18 months of recovery afforded me the opportunity to meet the most ordinary yet extraordinary people; to hear their stories.  I was able to learn of their battles and their fears and to unravel my own life story so that I could understand what limiting beliefs, developed through the circumstances of my childhood, had held me back so long in my adulthood. That time also brought me into contact with the most wonderful psychiatrist, therapists and psychiatric nurses who taught me, supported me, cared for me, listened to me, advised me, challenged me and gave me the gift of understanding.  That experience also provided the window for me to not only review my life thus far, but look towards the next fifty years. As a result of all that I experienced during that oh-so-dark and difficult period, I came to realise the extent of stigma surrounding mental health and to understand how mental health problems can develop and most importantly how it impacts so seriously on children and teenagers.  With that in mind, I launched my company ClearMinds Education in early 2015 which is dedicated to preventing the development of mental health illness in children by educating would be parents, working with teachers, parents, children and teenagers in schools and in the home AND by promoting methods of ensuring that children have the tools to face life's adversities through the development of positive self-esteem, courage, confidence, self-belief, aspirations and the ability to make the right choices.

So.....exactly why have I chosen to run for the Royal London Society for the Blind then and not a mental health charity?  Because a) I was asked to    b) .... because the person asking - Lizzie Haigh Reeve is a great friend and awesome charity fundraiser whom I respect so deeply that I want to support her work   c)  .... when I queried how on earth I could raise the stipulated sum of money to take a place in the marathon, (rather than how on earth do you think I can run 26.something miles?) her reply was - don't worry about that - I'll take care of the fundraising....you just do the running!  D) .... I couldn't think of an excuse, quick enough to come back at that  e) ..... I know that I have to be as fit and healthy as I can be to achieve all that I still want to in my life - and what better challenge to get me off my butt and start that journey to great health and f) because I am running to raise money to support children and adults who have little or no sight - and whom as a result can suffer terribly with the added destruction of mental healthiness. 

Few may have stopped to consider what it must be like to either have been born without sight, or to have lost one's sight at any stage in their lives. We must all have wondered at times in our lives how difficult it might be for us if we were to lose our sight; not to be able to see our children grow up; not to see them get married; not to see the beauty of all that is around us and importantly, not to be able to see exactly what is directly in front or around us as we try to navigate our way through even the simplest things, like walking from one area of our home to another, cooking, going to the shops....I could go on.  But I wonder how many have stopped to think how blindness impacts on the ability to develop even our most fundamental of needs - that of relationships with others.  Communicating with others, building relationships, making friends, having a voice, depend so heavily, with making eye contact with others. One relies on internal responses from seeing the person or people in front of us; we instinctively respond to facial expressions, to body language, to gestures and most importantly we automatically read the messages revealed so clearly in the eyes of others.  Our brains compute all that we see and deliver messages instantly as to whether other folk may be our friend, or foe. Without sight, we have none of those signs to aid our assessment of others, and the development of intimate relations - in finding partners and more basically just making friends, becomes so much more difficult than one would expect.  Not being able to see what others are doing in their response to you and not being able to make eye contact can impact hugely on confidence and for children and young people who lose their sight or are born without sight, forming meaningful and lasting friendships can for many, seem an almost impossible challenge. 

Thus I am walking, trotting, jogging or even perhaps running the London Marathon in April 2016 - to support all those who have little or no sight who are in turn supported by the wonderful work of the RLSB. In raising funds for this remarkable charity, I will also be supporting the mental health of children and teenagers - a theme as you now know, that lies at my very heart.

If you are still reading this long piece - you deserve a marathon medal of your own!  If you are still reading this long piece, you must have some interest in my story - and I thank you for your perseverance in reading to the end!  If you are still reading this long piece - can I ask one more, very very big favour?  I ask you to dig deep into your pockets - which are probably mostly empty, bearing in mind our ability to overspend at Christmas - and support my Everest sized challenged of getting myself from a 100 metre waddle to the Marathon finish line in April.  Please donate as generously as you feel able. Whilst I have committed to raising £2,500 for the RLSB - my heart tells me I want to raise nearer double that figure.  Please join me on my journey by donating courageously and by reading my blog, itsallaboutmentalhealth - which will diarise the highs and lows of my attempts to learn how to run, how to fuel my body, how to recover quickly, how to mentally focus on 'I CAN do this' rather than 'I can't bloody run to the end of the drive, let alone the equivalent of running from my house in Welwyn Garden City, Hertfordshire, to Twickenham or Bedford!'  Join me on this journey from short hop shuffle to long haul marathon medal. Training starts on Boxing Day - when I will have 16 weeks to prepare. Blog starts then. 

And finally - if you want to join me at the start line - watching, and waving me off that is - no not running (!)........and at the finish line to celebrate the completion of this ridiculous challenge.....plan for a long day out!  I suspect that if you leg it to the pub for a few jars whilst I do the hard bit, you will have more than enough time to become absolutely punch drunk by the time I crawl across the finish line!

And lastly, I'd like to thank Lizzie Haigh Reeve for being so ridiculously persuasive just by being who she is - and in advance I would like to thank Michael Woods of Lindsey Fitness - trainer extraordinaire for the guidance, encouragement, bullying and support I know he is going to provide, in getting this fat old bird - who would frankly rather be basted and eaten for Christmas than run a marathon - to the finish line.  

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