For Gemma, JimJamGem, GemGem, Gembo. 

Gemma was my sister-in-law, my brother's wife, my children's auntie. Even now, writing the word 'was' is difficult. 

Gemma was diagnosed with bowel cancer on her 37th birthday in March this year. 

It's ok, you think at the beginning, nowadays cancer treatments are often successful, nowadays cancer CAN be beaten, right? It will be alright, Gemma's a fighter. 

And Gemma was a fighter. Her hope NEVER ceased. But in the end, cancer won. 

Gemma died last month (as I write this) just over 6 months later.

6 months. Aged 37. You might know my brother Matt if you are reading this. 

Matt's wife has died, and every time I think about that it breaks my heart. 

She was so incredibly kind and caring- an animal person, a brilliant auntie. She was somebody who loved a bit of crazy golf, "chip shop chips" on Hythe beach and perhaps a trip to the pub and little gin! She was always thankful for the small things; trips to gigs (especially the Kaiserchief gig!) and of course playing with Mabel or Tedbear, her beloved cats. 

The Pilgrim's Hospice in Ashford gave Gemma the most incredible care in the last few weeks, and also:

• ran around making sure she had her favourite fruity ice lollies
• sorted it so that her very well-loved cat Tedbear could visit her 
• arranged a wonderful party with music and a delicious buffet
• listened to the amazing saxophonist (Dave- the wedding saxophonist who visited Gemma and Matt in the hospice for free)
• Offered constant kind words, understanding and actually listened. 

Gemma spoke a lot about raising money for the hospice. So let's do it. I'm not fit. And I'm not in shape. I’ll be running the London Marathon in April. Marathon. Ma-ra-thon…gulp!!! Running a marathon with 6 months to train is terrifying. 

But in Gemma's words I am going to:

"smash it, go and smash life"

Every training run in the dark with my stupid headlight on, every mile I add to make runs longer and longer, every injury, challenge and every time I stop and think I can't do it...

Run, walk or crawl- I can, and I will. For you, Gem. Love you girl.

In celebration of life.