Hello my dear friends and family, and everyone else reading this..

This will take quite a bit from me as you all know I am a very private person.. but here we go..

Only my closest family and friends know how much I love to do for others, how doing a weekly and monthly deeds make me happy and fill my heart with joy... and it could be anything from buying some food or lottery tickets for the homeless, cheering up a neighbor with a surprise beauty treatment or little something because they are having a hard time or are going through a rough patch and donating to animal shelters and charitable causes.. I don't advertise it because I love giving and believe in being a good person, and doing good to others without the need of publicity or affirmation from who ever.. and this year I want to do more and go bigger but for very different reasons and would like to ask for your help..

Cancer research charity is something I have been passionate about since like.. forever.. although the cause is very close to my heart because both, my grandmother and my mother, passed away from breast cancer and my sister survived it.. it has hit home the past year like never before.. and.. I never imagine I would have to write this.. but it is time that I must come clean to my closest and nearest .. that since last year November, I am also fighting that b@*% of a cancer..

In November 2021 I was diagnosed with a breast cancer. I won't be going into a detail with how it felt like a ton of bricks falling on me and how scary it was to sit there and hear the words " I am sorry to tell you that it is cancer".. but as you imagine it came with a lot of emotions and took a while for me to digest and to come terms with.. that is the reason I have been a little quite on my social media and in general.. and the last thing I wanted was to tell the world about it because I could not deal with updating everybody and answering messages and calls while I was trying to find a way to come to terms with it and trying to find answers to soooo many questions I never had before... so only a handful of people were told and thank you to those few for keeping it a secret for me too..

I always was aware that my risks of getting a cancer were higher as it was in the family but that is why I have led a life style I thought was healthier than your average with not smoking, very little drinking, very few late nights out and other.. yet, it still got me and made me extremely angry and sad..  

Although, I managed to find it relatively early, the battle I am on has not been an easy one as this year in January I was also diagnosed with BRAC1 gene which means that I have increased risk of cancer returning as well as several other cancers developing in the future— ovarian cancer, but also several additional types of cancer.. so the course of treatment I have been prescribed is a little more intense.. and I mean, how do you ever live with that thought that it might come back because you have the cancer gene? I can honestly not bear the thought of going through this ever again.. one time is one too many already!

I have already done 6 grueling chemo sessions and without going into it too much, I can honestly tell you that every single one of them has has felt like a hell.. and even though I thought I was tough and I was strong, and healthy and relatively fit, no word of a lie, it has taken every bit of power and stubbornness, at times, not to give in and give up..

Thank you to those few that knew and kept encouraging me, sending me treats, presents, sen