Hi Everyone

My name is Emma, I am about to tell you how I decided to climb Kilimanjaro.

I hope that by sharing my story, it will help to empower other Victims/Survivors realise how strong they are and that they are not alone.

When I was 14 my mum died and shortly after my dad started sexually abusing me. I kept this a secret for many years and just got on with my life the best way I knew how! During the abuse I developed an eating disorder, as a coping mechanism for what was happening to me. I couldn’t control what was happening but I could control what I ate and drank! It was something else to focus on. When I was 23 I sought help for my disorder but I didn’t keep up with the appointments, I knew I couldn’t be honest with her and my dad didn’t like me going. But then in July 2018, I had reached a point where nothing I did was making me happy, and I stopped eating and drinking. After 8 days of this my partner Emily took me to A&E and I was kept in for a week, I was fed and on a drip, my eating disorder therapist from my past came to see me and we arranged for my appointments to start back up. 

 I went to my appointments for a few months but again they weren’t working as I wasn’t being honest so In October 2018 I told my therapist everything about my dad. It was with her help and the rest of my family that I gained the courage to tell  my dad to get out of my life and leave me alone. I struggled a lot coming to terms with everything, as during it all I don’t think I acknowledged it as abuse. I kept thinking my dad loves me it’s love. But it wasn’t at all. Dads don’t do that to their children. 

Anyway, once it all came out and he was gone, that’s when the real work began, I had to deal with what he had done, whilst missing him (still a hard pill to swallow) I missed my mum even more. I didn’t feel like anyone could possibly understand my feelings, my anger, my pain, my heart was honestly broken into pieces. My job suffered, my partner suffered my family suffered watching me slowly get worse.  

In June 2019, I was admitted to a mental health hospital as I couldn’t keep myself safe. I won’t go into how this happened as I don’t want to upset anyone by reading. 

Whilst in there, I decided I wanted to turn my pain into a positive and give my self a challenge, so I decided to climb Kilimanjaro!!! I have been training for a while in the mountains, the hills and in the gym. My climb has been postponed numerous times due to Covid-19, but I have made the most of the extra training time. 

 By climbing Kilimanjaro and raising money I hope to spread as much awareness of sexual abuse and rape and I want people to know they are not alone! There is always someone to talk too! Once I was honest I could start to survive and with help from my therapist, my family and friends and my work I  am surviving!! 

 The survivors trust is and umbrella charity for smaller charities who help victims become survivors! 

Thank you for reading 

Every five minutes in the UK someone experiences rape, attempted rape, or sexual assault by penetration. 15% of girls and 5% of boys have experienced sexual violence by the time they are sixteen.The Survivors Trust is the only UK and Ireland-wide umbrella agency for specialist organisations supporting all survivors of rape, sexual violence and childhood sexual abuse. Our core aim is to ensure that society supports all survivors effectively and takes responsibility for ending sexual violence. Help us to achieve this.