After a textbook pregnancy, with no issues,  I never thought for a moment that I would see the concern in the Doctors eyes as she said "I'm sorry, I cannot find your babies heartbeat".... This was not what we had prepared for, we were so looking forward to welcoming our little boy into the world, with everything he could ever need and world full of love just waiting for him, our first baby. In an instance our hearts had been shattered, nothing can describe the pain.

Living from moment to moment and just about functioning, I hadn't considered what I may need to take with me to the Maternity Ward, as I prepared to give birth to my first baby...we packed my bag in haste, grabbing what essentials that we thought necessary. 

I was beyond terrified as I walked into the maternity suite at Derriford Hospital, however the Midwife's and Doctor's care was second to none, the care that we as a family received was amazing.

I remember feeling dazed and numb as my incredibly kind Midwife, Helen explained what was about to happen to me. She later brought in a pretty white box filled with things that would help us remember our time spent with Ollie, I listened but couldn't quite take anything in..... little did I know how important this little white box would become to us.

The SimBA Memory Box Charity provide memory boxes to bereaved parent's... The contents of Oliver's memory box included, three little teddies to place with baby, butterfly charm's, two wooden stars: to decorate with Ollie's name and hang up, a photo folder and SD card with pictures of our baby, two small knitted 'touched by you' blankets, two little metal hearts to place in the palm of babies hands, we also had a memory book to fill out which contained Ollie's precious hand and foot prints.

 Each item in Ollie's memory box has brought such comfort, I love seeing and touching his little hand prints, I cuddle up to his teddy and blanket every night and stare at his beautiful photo's constantly, the box also gave us the idea to give Oliver one of the Peter Rabbit teddies that we had bought for him and then later swap with another teddy (so that he had mine and I had his).  As I explained we packed my hospital bag in haste, whilst feeling completely dazed.... the idea of packing anything sentimental to help us with our grief later on, did not occur to any of us. I am so grateful to The SimBa Memory Box Charity, for gifting us our box, as it is invaluable to us and brings us comfort every day.

With our darling son's funeral approaching, we would love to do something positive in Ollie's memory and give something back to the amazing charities, that have brought us comfort and support, by raising money to help towards more memory boxes, for families like ours who find themselves in this devastating position.