In March 2011 my wife Lee was diagnosed with breast cancer. Her initial treatment seemed to have worked well, but after two years the cancer returned and despite three years of different chemotherapy drugs the cancer spread and in April 2016 were given the devastating news that there was no more viable treatment and that Lee would be given palliative care.

This care was to be given by the community care team at St Catherine's Hospice in Crawley.

The word "Hospice" and others, had been a banned word in our house.

In August 2016 Lee's condition worsened and after a short stay in hospital Lee was admitted to St Catherine's

I will never forget that journey in the Ambulance. Lee scared, very quiet ,in pain and barely conscious. As we entered the Hospice I remember thinking  she's not going to like it here.

But as we entered her room, the patio doors open looking out onto the beautiful gardens, fresh air filled the room, Lee sat up,looked around and smiled. The change in her was unbelievable.

The nurse who admitted Lee asked if there was anything else he could do, Lee replied "My mouth is so dry, do you have anything cold like sorbet?" He said "Yes, what flavor would you like, its available 24 hours a day, just ask."    

When he left the room Lee looked at me and said " I like it here, I feel safe, I don't want to go home."

We spent the next week sitting in the garden, reminiscing, reading, seeing family and waiting for the clinking of the drinks trolley that did the rounds every evening pushed by one of the many volunteers.

One of the things that struck me in the first few days was how all the staff and volunteers worked as a team,what ever you wanted, it didn't seem to matter who you asked, there was never a " that's not my job", the request it was always treated with a smile, a "no problem" and it was done. All the staff are true professionals, friendly, gentle, compassionate, who clearly love the work they do.

As our time together came to an end and the level of care increased the staff did everything to ensure that Lee was peaceful, pain free and treated with dignity and loving care. They kept me fully informed and ensured that I too was looked after.

Lee slipped away on the morning of Monday 22nd August 2016 and still the love and care continued. 

During those five years we continued to live life to the full with numerous holidays around the world, seeing Jamie and Maria get married and the birth of Lee's much wanted granddaughter Roxanne Lee Russell, our last family holiday together in Cornwall holds special memories.