April 13th update: Hi everyone! Yesterday was simultaneously one of the most unpleasant and pleasant days of my life. I ran the London Landmarks Half Marathon and it was horrific. But the good news is that I made it to the end in 2hr 46min. I am an elite athlete!

What's more - due in no small part to the heroic fundraising efforts of Max Rushden, Charlie Baker and the TalkSport audience, we added another £20,000 to an already astonishing total while I was out running in the race. Listeners to the Guardian Football Weekly podcast and TS have contributed the lion's share of the £87,000 raised.

Quick tot: including gift aid, my supporters have raised over £100,000 for Great Ormond Street and I look forward to this great hospital naming a wing in my honour in the very near future.

I am a generally humble man but now that I have joined Bob Geldof and Bono in making up the Holy Trinity of great Irish humanitarians, I would like to announce my immediate retirement from long distance running and philanthropy. If I'm being honest, neither of them suit me.

I would also like to thank every single person who has donated to this page and the wonderful cause that is Great Ormond Street Children's Charity from the bottom of my heart. Obviously I did all the work and hated every second of it, but collectively we have raised an astonishing amount of money and for that I am extremely grateful. Much love to you all!

Donating through JustGiving is easy so please donate if you can - every pound makes a MASSIVE difference!